Welcome to the VA!

It's been a year since we lost our insurance, and James hasn't had a physical in much longer than that.

The other day, I decided to do him a solid and apply to the Veteran's Administration for healthcare. It wasn't a difficult process, and we received a communication today that assured James that the VA was diligently trying to set up his initial appointment.

There was a phone number for him to call, which was listed as: 1-800-4231-2111.

So.

We were able to Google it and there was just an extra "1" in what should have been the three-digit middle number. James called using my phone because that's where the clickable Google phone number was.

An hour into the call, James came in to me panicked because someone had answered the phone but couldn't hear James. We fixed that, James left again, and then came back a few minutes later.

Apparently the guy had told James that his chart was empty and they needed to fill out some more information so we could make an appointment. Then he put James on a hold that seemed to be the same queue James had been in before.

I was doing something mindless and told James to just leave the phone by me. About 15 minutes later, someone finally answered. I explained what was happening, and they said they needed to transfer me to the person who could set the appointment.

James came back in as the person was answering (that was only a few seconds, so huzzah!) and said he needed to make an appointment. Guess what?

The local clinic had closed at 4:00 PM (it was 4:02 PM at this moment) so we'd need to call back tomorrow. WE HAD CALLED AT 2:41 PM.

I asked for a direct number, and she said that they don't have one; you have to call the main number. She said you can also just walk in and make an appointment on site, which might be easier? That seems bonkers to me.

James tried to explain about the wrongly-rendered phone number but she didn't seem to understand what he was trying to say, as she explained something about how recently the extensions had changed. She was fine. She was trying. But this process was ridiculous.

Wish us luck for tomorrow.

Remember when I used to do reviews and stuff?

Back in the day when I was on social media and had a pretty expansive blog readership, I would post reviews of stuff: specific (usually limited-time-only) offerings from fast food restaurants, hair color, chocolate, energy drinks, recipes, etc. 

That might seem like "duh, of course; that's what social media is for" but at the time, I had a lot of audacity to think that people would want to read my opinion about the steak bagel at McDonald's (still my most viewed blog post of all time; it continues to get hits even though it's more than 12 years old and no one reads blogs anymore). 

That's not how I started out, and it's not what I do now... BUT I did want to weigh in on something:

Recently, I got a 3-month free trial of Apple+ TV. James got caught up on Foundation and is finishing The Expanse.

First, I binged the entire run of Ted Lasso, very late to the game. Everyone was right: It was a delight, start to finish. Built up my emotional investment and had a very enjoyable payoff at the end (no, I'm not going to try to watch the upcoming 4th season because why?). 

After that, though, I noticed a little recommendation for Acapulco, another three-season (third season still in progress) show that looked cheerfully-colored and interesting. 

I'm caught up and looking forward to the Wednesday releases of the rest of this season, and here's my take: This show is every bit as hopeful and surprisingly emotionally-engaging as Ted Lasso. It's set in the mid-1980s, so that's probably hitting right in my nostalgia. About 1/3 to 1/2 of each episode is in Spanish, so I'm learning a bunch of conversational touches I wouldn't have known otherwise (of course, it might just be 1980s slang and using it will make me sound dated, but I don't care; I like the sound of "que padre!" and I still say, "How cool!" to this day). 

Speaking of nostalgia, one of my favorite touches is that every episode, they have the resort singers perform one (or two) 80s hits in Spanish with choreography. Delightful.

Anyhoo. It seems like this show has had high ratings, so maybe I'm the last one on board here but I just wanted to throw my two cents in and highly recommend it if you have Apple+ TV or if you were looking for something to round out your free trial!

Year-later endocrinologist follow-up, with bonus gynecology content!

I met with my endocrinologist today for the first time since my surgery. She told me that I needed to get a neck ultrasound ASAP, as I really should have gotten one pretty soon after the surgery. I wish I'd known because I had insurance until the end of August 2024! Now I'm applying for the Travis County Medical Access Program.

Also, the doctor mentioned that the medication I'm taking is actually lower than my weight would dictate I need, so she's wondering if that means part of my thyroid was left. I definitely hope not, because that would mean another surgery. I know there was a lot of inflammation, and I know guts look a lot alike so I suppose that anything is possible.

This wasn't a lot of fun when I had insurance, but I wasn't worried about the finances at all. If I have to do it again, it's going to suck, but it will suck a lot more than it did when I didn't have to stress over every penny (or tens of thousands of dollars).

To review, here's what I had done: Neck ultrasounds (one in an imaging place, two at my endocrinologist's office, and one in the surgeon's office), two sets of biopsies, a DEXA scan for bone loss, multiple labs measuring PTH and Vitamin D, a 24-hour urine test (the worst part of the experience by a wide margin), a nuclear scan (two+ hour procedure), a pre-op visit with the surgeon, the surgery and overnight in a surgical hospital, post-op with surgeon, more labs, and now prescription forever.  

Also, my regular doctor wants me to see a gynecologist because of some menopause stuff that isn't like "I feel weird" but like "that shouldn't happen and you need to get it looked at." And actually, I feel fine. It's hard to worry much when you don't feel off, but that's how it was with my hyperparathyroidism and Hashimoto's, so I know my body likes to hide dysfunction from my feelers.

I'm hoping if we get approved for the MAP, then I can stop obsessing over find the cheapest care for each specialty.

I hate healthcare being tied to a job.

My friend Adrienne told me that she doesn't care if I have to go into medical debt to take care of myself, so if that happens I'm just putting all of my medical providers on notice that Adrienne in Las Vegas (kind of) assured me it would be JUST FINE. You'll get $200 a month for the rest of my life, so I guess you'd better do a good job to make sure that I'm going to be around to pay it for a long time.

When you see it visualized like this, it seems like it wouldn't be any big deal to get the thyroid out! But also... that she removed the thyroid but kept 3 of my parathyroid glands in there is pretty unbelievable.

Revving back up

School starts back up this week, and Mal's calendar is about to get busier again, as well.

I have a mystery shop today; we're going to a trampoline park! Yay! I did some shops this weekend, just taking pictures, and those were NOT worth it. But today's will be a great indoor activity to keep Mal entertained without dying.

One of my shops this weekend was here. Let me know if you know what it is!

Then this afternoon, we have a Zoom call with Mal's school to kind of set expectations for the year. It sounds like there was some student drama last year and I'm guessing they want to stop that before it starts. The school is so awesome; they love the kids, and they're so affirming and patient. It's been a real blessing for Mal, and that's why we keep sending him, even though we are DESTITUTE. 

(Not really. It does feel like that sometimes. Anybody want to hire my husband?)

Wednesday, I have my one-year follow-up with the endocrinologist who referred me for surgery. I'm overmedicated, which is suppressing my thyroid-stimulating hormone (which you want to do at first if you've had cancer, just to make sure everything withers and dies), and has my cholesterol absolutely soaring. I am going to ask if after this appointment, I can switch medication management to my primary care office. They charge under $200 per visit, as opposed to my very competent and in-demand endo, who charges (and deserves) more than $450 per visit. Her office has worked with me and been extremely kind to keep pushing appointments back by 6 months while still adjusting and renewing my Levothyroxine prescription. I recognize that this professional bunch should be paid well for their amazing work... I just wish it were insurance and not me paying it! Feel me?

Also on Wednesday, we should be able to check in for our cruise! I know what you're thinking: "You just said you were destitute!" Well, yeah. We have planned a couple of trips expecting that James would have a job at some point, and so we're doing them... but after we visit Mexico in March, we'll put the kibosh on traveling for a bit. When it's been 2 years without a real income, we'll have to reevaluate some stuff.

BUT.

I'm very excited about the cruise because D is going with us! It's their first cruise in 15 years, and I know they're going to love it. It'll be nice to have the whole fam together (maybe not on the drive down or back, but, you know, in general) for a change.

My friend referred me to a sweet woman who's going to stay with our cats while we're away. She charges the same price for housesitting that we paid Rover to come feed the cats and empty the litter boxes for half an hour per day! Yay!

Then next week is the third anniversary of our "library" group! We started LGBT-friendly homeschool meetups because when I see stuff like this, I know they don't mean "us."

We'd had 6 regular members for a couple of years, but one kind of aged out (I wish we had more older kids, but that hasn't panned out yet) and one moved to Washington. It's cool, though, because Mal and Kona talk to him online and they play Minecraft or board games several times a week.

More recently, another kid has joined us, and he just fit right in! I'm really proud of our core group for not being cliquish; it probably helps that the group IS so small. I'm just excited to see what Year Four brings!

Also next week, Mal's classes soft-start with a couple of weeks of self-directed days to get back into the swing of things. And the open gym he attends is resuming sessions.

It will be his birthday before you know it! And actually, it will be MY birthday before that, so mark your calendar!

A New Hope (not Star-Wars-related)

I'd really forgotten a lot.

It was likely a self-preservation tactic my subconscious exercised on my behalf.

In preparing for an interview, I went back and for the first time read through the blog posts I made during 2010-2012. 

I have a few thoughts, and they're all over the place. So in no particular order:

1) Holy cow, I cringed so hard so many times. The things I said as a youngster (pre-40s, but barely)! Your girl has changed A LOT in 15 years, and that's, to borrow a probably-copyrighted phrase from Martha Stewart, a good thing. If you read my blog back then, and you rolled your eyes or gasped at anything I said ("Thanks, Feminism," I'm looking at you), WE ARE IN AGREEMENT. And I'm so sorry. It's bad. It was very, very bad and re-exposing myself to... myself (not in a dirty way, perverts) created quite a rip in the time-space continuum of who I know myself to be.

2) It's easy to believe the people can't or won't change. Good gravy, have I ever changed in the past decade. I like to think it's for the better. I do probably cuss more than I used to. But getting off of social media was a huge improvement. I feel like I am much more accepting and less judgmental than I was back in the day. I definitely don't obsess over my body or my hair or anything the way that I did 14-15 years ago. I'm pretty sure I am NOT maturing, though, so don't worry about that.

3) It was a complete surprise to me to learn that I kept two concurrent blogs during 2011-2012??! I had "Trailer Trash and Proud" for fun stuff like reviews, things we did, stuff I baked, etc. and I kept my older one for all of my angst and preaching and Deep Thoughts™. That one is very barfy and I only read it to make sure that I was remembering timelines and events correctly. But it was a painful read. Bleh. The stuff about my cool pancakes and all of the chocolate I bought in Dallas was a lot more on-brand and enjoyable.

4) After all of the stuff happened in the early 2010s, it was like I was running out of a burning building and didn't have the energy or desire to look back. Now that I have, I feel a lot less... well, just a lot less about it. The feelings aren't a big deal. I'm over it. Things didn't go the way they would have if they'd happened the way I wanted, and apart from my self-esteem taking a huge hit (but refusing to stay down, which actually would have made it easier), it was all really fine. Better in the long run, in fact. Much better.

5) Things I should have done differently: a) Immediately left my church. b) Moved to Austin a year before I did. c) Been more proactive in helping D deal with the huge changes I, too, was finding difficult. It SUCKS as a parent to be barely treading water and therefore not fully notice that your kid is struggling probably worse than you are. A lot of the issues D has had are because I was not thinking properly and didn't notice or realize things I should have noticed and realized. We both have a lot more perspective on this as adults, but it doesn't change that I messed up. I missed a lot. And I can't redo any of it.

6) That said, reading about where I was back then really makes me more hopeful in this part of my life! I was worried about the same things: finding a job, having enough money to make it, where would I end up if I couldn't afford where I was living anymore? Etc. At the time, I had a friend who compared it to swinging on a trapeze and how, for the trapeze to work, sometimes you have to let go and fly and trust that the other trapeze will be there to meet you when you get there. Right now, I have a whole other adult in this with me, and we have more resources than I did at the time. So it helped kind of jolt me out of some doldrums and I appreciate that a lot!

In 12 years, none of us has aged, including the kid. Which is weird. ;)