The Back Story

Since I started this blog, I don't think I've written at all about my ruptured disc, which is probably good, right? For a while, it was the defining situation in my life. I appreciate all of the prayers and everyone's concern, so thought I'd follow up with some information.

When I talked to the original doctor, back when he thought that it was possible that I just had a herniated disc, he said that about 50% of people feel better after 6 weeks, and that the other 90% feel better after 6 months. I assumed that meant "healed," and once I found out my disc was ruptured, I was pretty discouraged.

However, just after the six month mark, my symptoms started easing. Here are some things that I lost that I have gotten back: the ability to lounge in bed after I wake up, if I choose to (even though my positions are limited, I'll take it!); sit on the couch; sit through an entire movie, concert, etc. without having to reposition every five minutes; drive early in the morning without hating life; run; shake the hair out of my face just by moving my head; sit out on the porch. It's amazing how much these things affected my quality of life, and how happy I am to have them back. I hope I never take them for granted again.

Last week, I hurt myself playing laser tag. I know! They warn that laser tag isn't for people with back injuries (or asthma, for that matter) but I have played before since having hurt my back, and it was fine. This time, however, I just misjudged the angle of a ramp going up to the second floor. I lost my balance and pitched forward, with my left leg extended. One thing I still can't do, and am fairly certain that I've lost until I ever have to take some concrete treatment, is bend at the the waist with my left leg straight... So this hurt. Intensely. I wandered around up"stairs" for a few minutes, trying to walk off the pain. But mostly, I was trying to walk off the panic. What if I'd just given myself a setback from which it would take months to recover? Fortunately, that was not the case. I was pretty tender that night, but sleep was no problem. The next day was normal.

I live with slight to moderate pain fairly frequently. But it doesn't stop me from doing what I want to do. I have lost some of my precious flexibility, which wasn't anything I used much, except to kind of show off. But the fact that I can sit and chat with people instead of always feeling like I look like I'm getting ready to leave is a lot less awkward than things used to be. And sleeping a full night, not having to get out of bed at 3 or 4 AM for an hour, is incredible. Right now, as I sit here, I feel a tug in my left... um, upper leg. But I'll take being sore over crying in agony any day.

I am grateful for the restored semi-normalcy, especially given that I did not have to take heroic measures to get here. I am thankful that I was reimbursed for the money I spent on pain relief, plus a little bit extra. James said that the liability settlement didn't come close to making up for the emotional damage, and that's true. If James had taken me up on my offer to get out of marrying me because of the basket case I had become, I might have gone more ruthlessly for the jugular of the RV park. But I am sincerely happy and as healthy as I want to be, pretty much, and life is awesome. So I will continue to feel blessed with the way things turned out, and try to be appreciative of things that I used not to think about at all, since I've seen the other side.