Update, almost 2 years later: my neck

 Remember this?

It's that time back in May 2024 when I had a bunch of throat hardware yeeted to save my health and maybe even my life!

Briefly: diagnosed with hyperparathyroidism in early 2023 due to labs indicating high calcium followed up by labs showing high parathyroid hormone levels. Took a while to work through referrals for bone density scans, ultrasounds and a nuclear scan, needle biopsies, etc. before I finally found a parathyroid/thyroid surgeon who took care of everything. In the process, we learned that I had papillary thyroid cancer, but not until it was already out of my body and everything was good.

I just had labs done and the goodest news is that there are no thyroid antibodies in my blood anymore (and there haven't been since I've been tested starting a year after surgery), which means my body isn't fighting tumors because they all got removed! Yay!

But also good news is that my parathyroid hormone level is within range, meaning my three remaining parathyroid glands are doing their job.

My thyroid stimulating hormone is still a little low, but this is the first time it has been detectible since my surgery. This is because after having thyroid cancer and the removal of the thyroid, I was put on a suppression dose of synthetic thyroid medication to reduce the chances that any tumor material might get "fed" and grow. When you're overmedicated, your body doesn't send out thyroid stimulating hormones because you have plenty. That's not a good solution long-term, as being overmedicated can of course have negative health outcomes.

BUT this means that, as we've lowered the dose, we've allowed my body to move closer to equilibrium. My T4 free level is within range, but if it were just a little bit lower and my TSH were just a little bit higher, we'd be in that sweet spot and everything would be just peachy.

I don't have any symptoms from overmedication that I know of, and just like with my original diagnoses, we're just going on labs at this point. 

I feel really fortunate!

PS That picture was also from a few months before I realized that my hair was curly and I don't know how I missed it! 

Or maybe THIS was the "best day ever"?? /s

Today was a day off for James.

It was also the third and final day that D had an appointment before work. 

It was also open gym for Mal.

The kind of stuff I see every morning, but this was specifically today.

I got up, walked, and then was getting ready for my day when I heard an explosion and our power went out. 

As I was reporting that, I got a message from D that the car had crapped out, they'd gotten it pulled over, and once it was off, it wouldn't restart.

They got an Uber to take them on to their appointment, so I started getting ready to go pick them up. I asked James if he wanted to go with me to see if he could restart the car before we had it towed somewhere.

During this, I asked if Mal wanted to go with us or stay home. He decided to stay at the house until I reminded him that without the internet, he wouldn't have a way to get in touch us, so he elected to accompany us.

We went to the restaurant where D had parked the car, we couldn't start it, and I called AAA. James and Mal stayed and had breakfast while I went out to get D.

D's appointment took a while, so in the meantime, Mal and James got the car squared away, walked across the street to a grocery store, then went to the bank to order some pesos for our upcoming trip. From the bank, they could see a frozen custard store and decided they needed that.

Mal and James were walking across a parking lot to find a bathroom to wash their custard-y hands when we found them. We then came home, D went to work, James got some day off rest, and Mal and I hung out in his room for a while. 

Now it's pretty early but I'm very tired. The garage said they'd maybe get to our car Saturday but it might be Monday, so it's a good thing that D doesn't work at Ross anymore and can walk to their work now. 

Oh, and our electricity was restored while we were out and about. I had loaded the washing machine (with the second of 3 loads of wash I needed to get done today) and turned it on before we left, just in case the power came back on whilst we were away. It worked! The basket of clothes was clean and ready to dry upon our return!

Best day ever?

I feel like yesterday was a banner day for Mal and a couple of his friends. 

First, we had our library group. We met at the library where the kids played games. Then we went to the park as usual. 

When that was over, Kona had already asked to come over, which is always fine. But they also wanted Caleb to come. He was with our group for a couple of years then moved away for a year. Not only are they back, they are just a few blocks away so he and Mal have had a great time playing in the neighborhood.

We all walked back to our house and for the first time ever, Caleb's mom let him stay at a friend's house unsupervised! 

They all had so much fun, then about an hour and a half in decided to walk over to Caleb's house.

Kona's mom said she loved just roaming the 'hood with friends and I know Mal does, too!

After everyone went home and had dinner, they all three got online and hung out. They have a gaming group they've kept up during the year Caleb was gone.

Love love love to see these relationships flourishing. 

Guess where I am.

Did you guess? If so, congratulations! You just won an all-expenses-paid trip to the next paragraph!

I am at the mall on this very rainy Saturday.

But I'm not shopping because I'd rather stick a toothpick in my ear.

Rather, I'm sitting in the food court whilst these two kiddos do their kiddo thing.

I believe it's both of their first time to be let loose without family to window- and birthday shop on their own.

I'm fortunate in that Mal is a pretty mature kid, and he has some mature friends. I wouldn't trust every tween in this way, but these young 'uns got it.

It brings back memories for me of walking around Central Mall in Fort Smith, Arkansas, as a teen. I loved Coach House Cards and Gifts. They had such beautiful trinkets that I could never afford; but I still enjoyed staring at the figurines with the crystals and dragons and mermaids. Also, I LOVED humorous gift cards. There was also a big "pool" in the center of the mall with four separate fountains. It added some ambient noise to quiet the hubbub of the masses, and it made the whole place smell vaguely of chlorine.

Before that, when my mom would go shopping at Walmart, she'd give me a couple of quarters and I'd play the PacMan arcade game in the entry vestibule for half an hour or so.

We're at that stage where it's time to give Mal some slack to play with. One of his friends recently moved into our neighborhood, and he's walked to their house to hang out a couple of times already. That was after his solo excursions during the icy few days we had last month. He'd walk around for half an hour, check in, and go back out. He's showing himself to be pretty responsible in that respect.

By this time next year, I'm really hoping that his youth group (all kids roughly the same age, +/- a year) will be pretty fully autonomous. I enjoy the parents in that group (as opposed to all of the parents I ignore at most of the other places we go; not because there's anything wrong with any of those moms, but because I've already seen that when a homeschooled kid grows up, I'm not likely to be friends with many of those other parents), but I think giving the kids the opportunity to make their own decisions, take some risks, and even make bad decisions in a pretty safe environment is definitely the move.

If I won the lottery, I wouldn't tell anyone; but there would be signs...

Let's say I suddenly had unlimited money. What would I do? Here:

1) Take care of all of the deferred maintenance on the house: replace the rotting boards on the porches (probably with low-maintenance Trex, since we're filthy rich here), paint the exterior, replace the flooring in the bathrooms and bedrooms, patch and paint all of the walls, etc. I'd probably have in-floor heaters put in the tiled areas (bathrooms, but maybe remove the wood from the cooking part of the kitchen? We've dented it multiple times dropping ceramic and damaging the surface).

2) Might as well pay the house off, as well.

3) I'd have Ruggables all over the place. They have such neat designs, including subtle (and not-so-subtle) Star Wars ones:

This is "Mandalore" with the helmets they wear in the center.

Also, they just have super fun and colorful designs that I dig.

They are so enjoyable to look at!

The rugs are fully washable, which I dig... but they're really too expensive so I can't justify it. Unless I win the lottery!

4) For the bedrooms, instead of area rugs, I might go with Flor washable carpet tiles. What I like about them is that they adhere to the floor, so there's less chance of tripping if the rug folds over on itself. Also, if you ruin a tile, you just replace that tile and the rest of the carpet stays in place.

5) I would buy my first electric car.

Right now, a 2025 VW Electric Buzz is just under $60k! In 2026!!

6) Obviously, James would quit his new job; I hardly ever see him anymore and I kind of like that guy.

7) If I couldn't find what I need at a thrift store, I'd only buy sustainably-made, high-quality clothes made by people who are paid a living wage. I've never felt like I could swing $75 for a t-shirt, but if I were loaded? Yup!

8) Speaking of trying to make the world a better place, we'd get back into supporting ReWork, a local program to help people transitioning out of homelessness by providing job skills, work, and every day life training. We kept donating for a year after James got laid off, but then we had to stop. I'd love to rejoin at a higher level. I'd also ratchet up the giving for BlackMamasATX (which we kept our monthly donation with them because it wasn't as much as we were giving ReWork). They provide services for pregnant black women, who have a higher maternal mortality rate than white women; plus, as recently as 2016, fully half of medical residents believed that black people have higher pain tolerance than white people, and because of this, black people are less likely to be believed when they report pain. I love the idea of EVERYONE having a baby to have a doula, someone whose sole job is to advocate for the patient so they can just focus on having their baby and not medical stuff.

9) I'd buy more online treats from places like Fat & Weird Cookie, plus almost everything offered by the King Arthur Baking Company, whose catalogs give me the worst FOMO.

10) We'd be able to help D "launch" more significantly. 

11) MUCH more travel. We've been planning a trip to Chile for about 5 years. A lot of the waiting has been because Mal does NOT want to be on an airplane overnight (he's never used an airplane restroom and says he absolutely will not). But it's not a cheap trip, and we keep kicking the can down the road. We'd fly to Santiago and spend a week, then take the flight over to Rapa Nui (Easter Island) for several days. After that, back to the mainland for a week  on the coast at Valparaiso and Viña del Mar. Heck, though, if we were rich, we could take a monthlong trip! 

Now, there are some things that would not change if we won the lottery: 

a) I still wouldn't be a spendthrift. I'd still look for coupons and deals and use them when possible. Although I mentioned buying more sustainable clothes, I promise you that my sense of fashion would not improve in the least and I'd still frequently look like a hot mess.

b) I wouldn't waste money on expensive real estate or "nice" cars just for the sake of having a "nice" car. (But if I could find a Chevy Astro that had been meticulously cared for, I'd snatch it right up!)

c) I'd still only have one purse at a time. I don't understand people who have a handbag for every outfit. I need one purse where I know where everything is. I received a purse for Christmas and it has taken me until now to fully intuit which pocket holds which thing.

d) I'd still cook at much as I do. The only real difference is that I might subscribe to Chef Unity or Factor meals for stuff for James to take to work. I'm trying to pack him a lunch every day (and D, when they're scheduled open-close) and it's a lot of thinking and planning. If we had a place to put a deep freeze, I could meal-prep every week or two, but that's not an option with our limited room.

e) I wouldn't build a garage for our cars. We don't have a driveway, carport, or anything. We park on the side of the house where the ground has some gravel, but people always stop by asking if they can put down more gravel or blacktop. Nah. I don't want to build a structure there because it would kill my view! I love the trees, seeing birds and having sun flood into the kitchen in the mornings (except when it reveals that I need to clean better).

f) I'd still keep my phone, watch, computer, etc. until they wear out. I have an iPhone 12 mini, which I bought 5 years ago. Last year, I paid Best Buy $100 to replace the battery and it's been as good as new ever since. I have a camera I love, so I don't need to upgrade for photos. I just like to use things until they're no longer usable. 

Okay, thanks for this brief low-stakes flight of fancy. Have a good week, friends!

Mal has to get used to this

Over the past couple of weeks, Mal has headed back into James's office or our room to tell James something... only to find that James isn't home.

Today, on the way home from meeting a friend, Mal said, "Since we didn't watch that program last night, we should watch it as soon as we get home, if Dad's awake. 

I had to remind him that his dad IS awake and is, in fact, at work.

It's an interesting situation. Mal is 11, and for the past six years of his life (minus about a month), James has either worked from home or not worked at all. 

That's more than half of Mal's life!

Another thing is that James is often absolutely exhausted when he gets here, and at night, like yesterday, he's ready to go to bed as soon as he's eaten dinner. 

One of the traditions that James and Mal have had over the past few years is that at around 10 PM, Mal will go into James's office to announce that he's "ready to talk." (I'm usually well into my night's sleep by then.)

James will go into Mal's room, and they'll catch up for 10 minutes or half an hour or whatever it takes. 

I think this is beautiful. It's something James is going to try to make sure happens whenever he can, even if it's less than when he didn't have anywhere to be.

On the way home from Temple yesterday, we stopped in at The Home Depot because I needed to pick something up (nope, we don't get an employee discount; they don't have one). 

While I ran in, Mal hung out in the garden center with James for a few minutes.

You might notice that James is standing upright without crutches! He was limping around, but able to work without crutches. He took them, and he used them to walk into the store, go to the break room, and just get around in general. But he could hobble out of the little garden center hut to scan stuff, so that's a good sign!

What I have done today...

 ... At this moment, I'm standing at the kitchen counter waiting for my Instant Pot to come up to pressure. Because I'm boiling water! Yay! We're under a boil water notice! Freezes in a small town with old water infrastructure are SO MUCH FUN.

At least it's pretty out there!

This morning, I got up and got some breakfast for James so he could take his meds, then was headed out for a walk when I realized that both D's and James's cars were undriveable due to ice on the windshields. I came back in, got the keys, and went to work on both. D and James both worked today, but while I was scraping, D messaged me that their blood draw had been postponed as the lab was delaying opening for a few hours. 

I concentrated on James's vehicle, then moved it to the street so he could go down our walkway instead of having to walk all the way around the house. Problem there is that the walkway had refrozen overnight, but I did not have time to deal with it before James had to go, and told him to use his crutches in the grass. He made it!

D's car was stuck in the ice, a problem for later.

I managed to get in a pretty good walk. I had wanted to go down to the lake because there was a lot of steam rising off of the water, but I couldn't get down the hill safely. I did a big loop of the neighborhood, saw that D's work parking lot was like a skating rink, and came back home.

I made myself some breakfast and was finishing up when D was ready to go to work. I helped rock the car out of the rut and D was on their way.

We were running out of food and Mal was up and hungry, so I started using the three potatoes we had left to make him some oven fries. In the meantime, I used two heels of bread (the only white bread we had left) to make him some cinnamon toast.

D got off of work and headed into town to do labs, and I went outside to try to clear the walkway. Most of the ice was slushy, though some of it still needed a shovel to help it calve off. I spent about an hour banging ice with a shovel, getting up under large pieces and prying them up, and then using a push broom to move it into the grass. Good exercise, and I wasn't even a little bit cold!

The group that usually meets at the library on Tuesdays decided to have a virtual meetup because 1) the library was closed and 2) at least one person couldn't get out of their driveway yet because it's steep. Mal, Canyon, Blake, Kona, and Alota had a nice couple of hours hanging out online!

Leading up to this, Kona had quite the adventure: She'd gone to a friend's house for a sleepover Saturday night and couldn't leave Sunday because of the roads. Things thawed a bit yesterday afternoon, but her parents still couldn't come get her: parents live at the bottom of a big icy hill and friend lives at the top of a big, icy hill. This morning, everything had refrozen and the overnighter had turned into a three-nighter.

Fortunately, Kona's sister has a friend whose dad had realized that by letting some air out of the tires, he could get around in his big truck pretty well. He drove out to Kona's friend's house and waited for Kona at the bottom of the icy hill. Kona packed up her stuff and sledded down to him! 

Back to my day: it was time to start on dinner and, like I said, we had little food. I googled "pantry-friendly pasta sauce" and found this. As I was making it and had decided to do the whole "cook the pasta in the sauce" thing, I received the aforementioned boil water notice, so I spent about an hour boiling 6 gallons of water I had hoarded when I heard our water might be turned off completely. I used the induction burner and the Instant Pot, and can report that the burner wins the speed test on boiling a gallon of water by about 4 minutes.

Good news for Mal is that the boil order means no bath for him tonight (he likes to play in the tub, and I don't want him accidentally ingesting bacteria that might make him sick). They said not to even brush teeth with the tap water until further notice.

Mal spent a good deal of time today walking around the neighborhood, enjoying the last of the frozen stuff. He walked for quite a long time Sunday, to the point that I got in the car to go get him at one point, because he'd been out for almost an hour without checking in, when he'd been sure to pop in every half hour or so before that.

Yesterday, we'd tried to walk and realized it was a LOT worse, having melted and refrozen, so he had to stay in the yard all day Monday.

Today, he got to walk a bit more, and he wore his AirTag this time, in case I needed to verify his general vicinity.

James got home and had dinner, then we watched "Stumble" and are winding down. I'm hoping Mal's gym is open Thursday, because we're at risk of catching cabin fever over here.