Cooler heads, prevail!

Friday, I had a lot of friends who were jubilant and a lot of friends who were miserable. Saturday, I had a lot of friends who were jubilant and a lot of friends who were irritated and perplexed. As for me, I have a lot of hope. I have a lot of opinions, but I have even more hope.

I, too, have been a bit disenfranchised, as I'm sure most of us have been, over the past, really, year's social climate. In just the past week, I've seen people I care about and admire called names on social media and by "news" outlets... and I just really want us to do better.

Believe me, I get that knee-jerk stomach punch feeling that comes when someone says something that goes against what I know to be right or true. And while I'm not willing to say that there's no such thing as absolute truth, I will say that there are many things we want to insist are inarguably one way or another when that just isn't the case.

Or, in their words, "There's room for everyone in this world, so everyone make some room."

I can't do anything about the news outlets, except recommending that you just stay away from the more biased sources, whether they oppose your viewpoint and piss you off or affirm your beliefs and make you smug and unwilling to keep an open mind.

Maybe use this nifty graphic from this website as a guide, committing to reading/consuming the publications toward the middle and top of this picture.

Now, I'm going to make a commitment to you, and I hope you can extend the same courtesy to me, and, really to everyone else who might not agree with you:

1) I will not assume that the beliefs you hold are because you are *something*: ignorant, racist, sheep, liberal crybaby, baby murderer, misogynistic, not a patriot, (and, if you're a Christian: watering down the gospel to make it palatable, trapped in legalism, weak faith, not really a believer), etc. unless you do something I can point to and tell you to your face. I've seen so many people talk about how "the other side" doesn't value freedom or how they're just mindless drones doing what actors tell them, or how they're hell-bent on keeping women pregnant and in the kitchen. I don't think these caricatures are broadly applicable, and gross generalizations and insults weaken a person's argument (stance, not necessarily "fight").

Even if I disagree with you, I'm going to assume that you came to your conclusions based on a mix of your experience, research, and thought. If you want me to explain what I think or believe, I'm glad to talk about it, and I'm glad to hear your side. I do not assume that, given enough of *my* special information that you'll change your mind and see your way to the "correct" side, and I hope you don't think that about the information you give me.

However, I will say that one of my best friends over the past 20 years is someone who has been, at various times, on the polar opposite side of most political issues from me (although, over time, we've both moved more center and have, in fact, reversed sides on some things), and through our relationship and talking, I've seen a different side of things than what I believed, and I've changed my thoughts on a lot of things. That's not always comfortable, but I think we have to be open to that.

Otherwise, you're just one person talking at someone else, and that conversation's not going to last very long, because it's not fun to be yelled at and not heard.

2) If I disagree with you enough that I feel I need to bring it up, I will have actual facts to back up any arguments, however impassioned. However, know that I probably won't bring it up. Honestly, I have enough on my plate to pick a tiff with anyone else.

3) I will not presume to understand the way that "all" Democrats, Libertarians, Republicans, Independents, anarchists, Christians, atheists, black people, poor people, teenagers, Muslims, pro-choicers, 2nd Amendment activists, etc. must think. I will not assign to you a morality or ethic that you do not personally hold. I will respect you as an individual.

4) I will seek information and listen to people outside of my "echo chamber." I will seek to be empathetic. I will try to see it from someone else's point of view. I am currently in a personal struggle with where to land on a certain political stance, and I'm not going into it here because it would become "the" thing, and it's not what this post is about, but let's just say that I spent about 21/22 of my life "knowing" the right answer, but people I really admire have helped me see another side. I still think that what I believed is *mostly* right, but not "zero tolerance" right anymore. I want to be willing to examine with honesty and openness any issue that is important to the human race. I might not change my mind, but I might. I will fight my own bent to stay soft here.

I think I just ran out of steam. Plus, I have to empty the litter boxes to get the trash out this afternoon, because my life is glamorous. Anyway, can we be nice to each other? Can we remember that he IS your President, if you're a citizen of the US? Can we remember that protests aren't the same thing as riots, and that a LOT of really positive change has happened in our country's history because of people marching for things they believe in? Can we all hold these impassioned beliefs and not let it rip us apart?

Peace out. Scoop time.