When the party's over...

We fly home tomorrow and I'm having a lot of mixed feelings!

At two weeks, this is the longest vacation I've ever taken. There have been some moments of stress, but every day was unfailingly fun and we saw so many awesome things.

We started in Carlsbad, visiting LEGOLAND and the Museum of Making Music. We stayed three nights at the LEGOLAND Hotel, and it was terrific: price comparable to other hotels in the area, great theming, good pools, and a full breakfast buffet included.

Next, we took a Lyft up to Anaheim to visit Disneyland, Disney's California Adventure, and, of course, Downtown Disney. This is also where we celebrated Mal's birthday. We stayed four nights at the Howard Johnson Anaheim and it could not have been better. Great staff, clean room, super close to everywhere you want to be, great garden pool. It also has a small water park, but Mal couldn't have cared less about that. He was in the pool every day.

We rented a car to move up to Burbank, but that ended up being not hugely necessary. We did go to Bob's Big Boy, but our plans to visit the Griffith Observatory were scrapped because there were just too many people. Even visiting a small park to see the Hollywood sign, we had to park down the road. So many IGers! We did get an Amazon gift card from Avis and so that likely made the cost of the car about the same as if we'd taken another Lyft.

In North Hollywood, we stayed two nights at The Garland, a hotel built by Amanda King's mom herself, Beverly Garland. Her sons run it now. It was classy and retro, and I wish we could stay there a week. Loved it so much. Mal also loved the pool! We visited Universal and concentrated mostly on Super Mario World. I HIGHLY recommend paying $30 extra to get into that area before the park opens. Between that and single rider and hitting other rides within the first hour the park was open, we would have been finished by noon if we hadn't had reservations at... this place. It took me a while after I saw my charge today to remember what it was. Can you guess?

Ha ha. That's right: Toadstool Cafe.

We rented a car through AARP from Enterprise and drove from Los Angeles to Solvang. We stopped at Santa Barbara on the way, got our feet in the sand (and tar on our soles), then stayed one night at The M Solvang. We really enjoyed the Danish atmosphere, and the Danish pancakes, Danish sausage, and aebleskiver. 

The drive from Solvang to Yosemite was just over 5 hours, but it passed quickly. We finished up "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets" (disclaiming Jo Rowling, shame she's sullied her legacy by being a bully). We stopped for lunch at Huckleberry's, which was billed as "Southern Cooking with a California Twist." We had to see what was up. It was kind of like Cracker Barrel meets Mark Twain in New Orleans.

At Yosemite, we stayed at the Yosemite Valley Lodge, the most expensive night of the trip! It was pretty rustic and no air conditioning (which normally would be no biggie, but they're experiencing a record-breaking heat wave right now!) but they had several fans we were able to use to keep the air circulating, and we were quite comfy! 

It was great walking around in nature before people woke up because at places like Tunnel View and the Mariposa Grove of giant sequoias, there were just to many people. I know! We were some of those people. But first thing in the morning, it was cool, quiet, and lovely! Even when we went to breakfast and it was pretty packed, it was somehow more laid back than everyone trying to get the perfect selfie in front of El Capitan (which was GORGEOUS, even with literally 80 other people).

Next, we made our way to San Francisco, where we stayed at the Music City Hotel and Rehearsal. It is technically a hostel, but we had a private room. We did have to use community bathrooms, and it was no big deal. This was the cheapest night of the trip: About $135, plus $28 parking. Not bad at all. Also no air conditioner but fortunately we were there the day before the record heat.

We definitely did the tourist thing and saw the Golden Gate Bridge, then went to Fisherman's Wharf, where we ate fresh seafood. We also visited Trader Joe's for snacks.

The next morning, we drove over the Golden Gate Bridge to Fairfield, where we went to the Jelly Belly Factory. We also watched a movie, "The Wild Robot," while we were in town. Then we finished our last leg, arriving in Sacramento yesterday afternoon.

Last night and this, we are staying at The Delta King, a de- and re-commissioned paddle wheel river boat. Like the Music City hotel, this place has tons of personality. 

I had returned the rental car last night, so this morning (before it got into the 100s), we walked to the Capitol building, and explored Old Sacramento. Later, we went to the California Railway Museum. 

Now we're just winding down and getting ready to head back. I'll be glad to see D, and Mal is excited to get back together with his friends. But also, it's been amazing not having to do the day-to-day minutiae of real life. And we've had such a great time together.

I wish we could take a year, slow down, and really see as much of the country as we were able. I wish we could all 4 go, and find a way to make it work in an oversized RV, maybe with two floors. But James needs to find work again, and we need to get back to a less expensive routine. We're heading into fall, so pretty soon I will be deliriously happy about the weather. 

Good times with some really amazing experiences. If you want to see a vast pictorial history of the fortnight, there's an album here.

Southern California Amusement Parks, some thoughts

We've officially been on vacation for a week, during which time we have visited 4 theme parks: LEGOLAND California, Disneyland, Disney's California Adventure, and Universal Studios Hollywood.

Those are all of the parks we'll be visiting on this trip (theme, anyway; we're going to a National Park soon!). We definitely had good experiences in all, and some less good. I'm going to start with the less good.

For each of these parks, we got there for rope drop (Mal was very worried that "rope drop" was an extremely scary ride he did not want to join; had to fill him in on the lingo). The first hour or two we were in each of the parks, we got to do a lot of rides (well, most days; Mal didn't feel great the day we went to Disneyland, and we wasted some time doing the monorail instead of riding rides that would be too busy to ride later, but he REALLY wanted to ride the monorail and we were trying to keep him happy). After a couple of hours, lines got longer.

However, there was a HUGE difference in what this looked like at LEGOLAND and Universal vs. what it looked like at the two Disney parks. 

This is the first time I've ever been to Disneyland. When we planned the trip, the days we were going were predicted to be fairly middling. Disneyland Resort was forecasted to have medium crows, with 4/10 at Disneyland and 6/10 at California Adventure. I just looked and the crowd calendars were just way off. Our day at Disneyland, crowds were at a 7. DCA day, 8. And we felt it. After noon, there were just wall-to-wall people. We couldn't have a chat as we walked around; we just let one person lead with the others following behind, bobbing and weaving and trying not to hit or cut off people. It was overwhelming and unenjoyable at points in a way I've never felt (even with pretty significant crowds) at Disney World. 

We DID enjoy the things we did and saw. But I don't think I'll be in any hurry to return to Disneyland. It's just too compact and too packed. I think what's happening is that Halloween is just so popular, the crowd forecasters need to understand that people are just going to pack the parks regardless. Also, it looks like Sundays are less busy that weekdays, which feels counterintuitive. In case anyone else is planning a trip.

LEGOLAND was the perfect speed for Mal. We got to go in half an hour early because we were staying on property, and we did the dino coaster first... whoops. Mal was excited, but it was WAY too wild for him. We learned that he just can't do any rides where you feel pressure from changing/redirecting inertia. But we followed that up with a tame boat ride he loved so much, we ended up riding it three times. 

We were able to walk around most of the park in about 5 hours, and saw the rest that we missed the next night. It was pretty cool: I hadn't planned a second day at LEGOLAND, but when I bought my ticket, they were having a buy one/get one sale and since their Brick-or-Treat Monster Party isn't a separately-ticketed event, we went over for that. It was super chill, we rode a couple of things we hadn't seen or ridden before, and then Mal finished it up with the dino boat ride. We got so much candy, we'll probably take some home next week. We've been snacking up on it in the room.

Today, we went to Universal. We'd paid $30 to be able to go into Super Nintendo World an hour before the park opened. That was a super choice. After an hour, James was able to ride the three rides in the lower lot before the other visitors got down there. Mal and I rode "The Secret Life of Pets" a couple of times with no wait between. The early-entry ticket also gets you onto the studio back lot tour with no wait, but there wasn't much of a line when we got to that, anyway. There was when we left!

We'd made reservations at the Toadstool Cafe and had our first and last (so only!) sit-down meal in a theme park. Then James and I both got to ride Harry Potter very quickly through the single rider line. Mal rode "SLOP" (what he calls The Secret Life of Pets ride) with James once, then he and I went shopping while James rode HP. We left the park a bit before 3 PM and had done everything we wanted to do, except maybe the Simpson's ride. I didn't want to double our ticket price to pay for the Express Pass, and it wouldn't have been worth it.

LEGOLAND and Universal were busy enough, but we had comparatively chill days at both of those.

I do want to talk for a moment about the Single Rider lanes... What an amazing time-saver! Between Lightning Lane at Disney (where you pay $30 extra to be able to skip the main line one time for each ride) and single rider, we didn't wait more than about 15 minutes for any ride, except Rise of the Resistance, where a lot of the "line" is an immersive experience, anyway. If your party doesn't mind splitting up, it's so much faster than the standby line, especially if you don't have Lightning Lane. In fact, Radiator Springs Racers doesn't have a normal Lightning Lane: You have to pay about $25 PER PERSON for just that ONE ride if you want to skip the line. But we got to do it super fast (it was under 5 minutes from the time I got in line until I was sitting in a car) because of Single Rider.

All of this to say: I know how to strategize avoiding crowds and lines. But, holy cow, that did not work at the Disney parks. We had fun doing what we did, but the experiences left us worn out and threadbare. We did not feel as chewed up and spit out after our days at the other two parks. 

Just a brief FYI.

We've done other stuff on the trip, too. We went to the very informative and fun Museum of Making Music, we watched the sun set over the ocean, we have spent HOURS by different pools (today is the last day Mal can swim on this trip; our next places don't have pools), and have enjoyed each other.

Tomorrow, we head north. We'll get to a beach, then to a little Danish village, a National Park, and eventually the capital of the state! I think we'll be ready for a day of driving instead of walking miles and miles!

If you want to see vacation pictures, they're here.

Economy of Scale

We've been talking to Mal about how we're going to see a lot of things we'd like on our trip but that we just can't buy something everywhere we go.

James took him to Bricks and Minifigs last night and said Mal ended up building a $4 skeleton, but window-shopped a lot, saying, "Oh, that's way too expensive!" Or, "I know we can't spend $300, but for what you get, that's a real bargain!"

Last night, Mal asked me, "Just how much is this trip going to cost?" I asked him what he thought it would cost. He said, "$1200?" I told him it was a little bit more than that. He exclaimed his surprise at the astronomical sum. I reminded him that we've been saving for a year, and that's why we can still do it even though James isn't working.

Nine-Eleven, and looking back

Someone on the "Ask Old People" subreddit asked this morning: "What was the internet like during 9/11?" They were wondering whether people were on chat boards talking about it or looking for news. One response said that except for universities, people didn't use the internet much at that time. I had to divest them of that notion by pointing out that by September 11, 2001, I had been "blogging" for half a year. 

This made me curious about what I'd written regarding the event (which I downplayed a lot; I guess because I wasn't trying to be a news blogger but just talk about my own personal experiences). I looked, and here's some of it:

"I left work in a snit...

"Ken was already gone when I got home and I promptly managed to over-turn a McDonald's sack, spilling my half of the French fries (which Kaley was more than happy to clean up). After eating a no-longer-on-sale cheeseburger, I went out back to trim some severely over-grown and most likely dead shrubs.

"Having just talked to my sister about our husbands trying to work our part-time employment into the immediate post-delivery future, I was already starting to get defensive. Ken hasn't played the 'you have to; we can't afford this' card yet, but I could clearly envision the future conversation. Mowing down vast quantities of deer grass, I practiced my eventual breakdown: 'You agreed to this before we ever decided to have a baby!' Then I wondered if I was talking to Ken or to God. We involved God in our plans to have a child. So I started wondering where God was and why He wasn't just fixing this situation for us.

"Back and forth... I thought about my cousin who lost a baby earlier this week. I'm sure she'd gladly eat dirt if it meant she could hold her child. But that didn't make me feel much more fortunate. I've been healthy all of my life and through this pregnancy. I realize I take it for granted. I probably am being a brat. But I want Ken and me to be able to be COMPLETELY happy about the nearing delivery of our child instead of having to harp on how we're going to provide for her. And I was mad that all of our efforts seemed for naught and that God couldn't just intervene in the way I wanted him to so we could enjoy the rest of this pregnancy...

"You may remember a few months ago, I wrote that something had happened that I felt completely redefined our relationship... I wasn't sure if it was the hormones or if it really was a huge shift. Now I realize it was the latter. And, though it took some getting used to, it has completely changed my married life for the better.

"I decided to go finish the front yard, a considerably smaller task, then take a cool bath, and write... in my journal briefly before settling in to watch some TV before bed...

"Instead of indulging in a long bath, I took a quick, cool shower and headed into the computer room to relay the events of the evening. Mid-way through doing that, though, I happened to run across something that made me really mad at Ken. I mean furious. So I couldn't even finish what I was writing...

"I waited up for Ken. He got home a bit after 11:30, at which time I found out that the whole rampage-causing irritant was just a misunderstanding. We talked until a bit after midnight and then went to sleep.

"So, even though I did get up a couple of times during the night, I pretty much slept when I was in the bed.

"And after all of my histrionics yesterday, we get up this morning and see on the news that the Pentagon had been attacked by a hijacked airplane, then it cut back to coverage of the World Trade Towers... Suddenly makes my not-yet-serious concerns seem really petty.

"A special church service has been called for tonight; I'd imagine it's going to be a prayer session. So this evening, I really AM going to be thankful for my blessings while asking God to be with these peoples' families and the rescue workers."

Meh.

I went back and read through quite a bit of my first year (and then the 7th year) blogging. A couple of things:

1) My marriage was hard from basically the get-go. Ken floated the idea of separation or divorce when D was 1, but I rejected it because I didn't want to have to put D in daycare so I could work again, and because I'd already been divorced once. The stigma toward divorce was still very strong then, especially within the church.

2) I was a much more uptight and judgmental person two decades ago. I make myself tired. I can't read too much because it's so cringe-y and terrible. I'm sorry to anyone who read my original online journal.

 

A decade ago...

 James took this video of me on September 7, 2014 (and for the record, I can rotate videos now!):

I guess I was maybe having Braxton Hicks contractions? I don't remember this at all, but I do remember that we were still A FULL 2.5 WEEKS AWAY FROM DELIVERY.

I don't know whether you've been around long but for you newbies, I'll tell you that I was pregnant for 42 weeks and 6 days. The last month was just crazy. I kept going in to see the midwife and she'd look into my eyes and say, "You don't have 'the look' yet. You're not close." 

Anyhoo, I will be on vacation for Mal's birthday and might not have a chance to pontificate here about how the past decade has been one of the most challenging and delightful of my life. Having a kid in your 40s is no joke, and having a kid who is as emotionally complex as Mal at all is also quite the parenting honing adventure!

I'm pleased to say that Malcolm has changed from a constantly-crying baby to an easily-upset toddler and into an incredibly sensitive, clever, and fun-loving kid I'm so happy to have as the second child I never knew that I wanted.

Ha ha... I assumed these pictures would upload in chronological order but they did not! So enjoy some randomly-placed photos of my sweet almost-10-year-old!

Summertime Blues (instead of reds)

It has been 103 days since the onset of my most recent period. (Editor's note: Made it 108 days and started on our way out the door to a water park. Happy birthday to me!)

Lest you have the urge to start doing the menopause dance, allow me to share with you my experience over the past 3 summers:

In 2022, I stopped having a period after July 10, only to pick back up on November 2 (116 days). After that, my cycles were fairly regular (for me), about 22-40 days in length.

In 2023, I stopped after June 6 and picked back up on November 5 (153 days). The periods leading up to that were wild. In April, I had a 10-day period! In May, we were in Montreal and it was only three days... but like, still as much as the 10-day one. Mal and I were on public transit for hours sight-seeing, and it was not tidy but it was our last full day in town and I didn't want to cut anything short!

It was this day. Man, I am ready to go back!

This year, my last period before summer break was absolutely terrible. It was again short, maybe 2 days, but it was so much in such a short time frame that it was overwhelming. I had lots of things to do, but if that ever happens again, I'll just stay home. I couldn't keep up.

Will I beat last year's record? I hope so. If ya gotta bleed, you could do it in a worse place than Montreal, but I don't want to be dealing with that on our vacation next month! So hopefully we again make it to at least November before anything happens.

What I do notice is that each year so far, the period before the break backs up one month: July in 2022, June in 2023, and May this year. Wish me luck and all that.

Then again, I did have my thyroid removed so who knows if or how that might affect it. My thyroid was functioning normally before, and now things are slightly "hot" until we make sure my antibodies are gone and start dialing back the dose.

Regardless, wish me luck... This process is very annoying and I'd like to be done with it!

What a difference a decade and a half makes!

This morning, Mal wanted me to come sit with him while he woke up. I love to do that, but I'd already been up, walked, and made breakfast and I was ready to sit somewhere comfortable, which his bed is not (it's under a window, so there's nowhere to rest my back without the window pane cutting into my upper spine).

I asked if he'd sit on the couch with me instead, and he said it was too cold. So I got him a blanket, he covered up, and we snuggled for a bit.

After he was up and around a bit, I started to fold up the blanket to put it away. 

"I still need that! I'm a little chilly."

I suggested that he turn off the ceiling fan, which he did.

Now I'm going to interrupt this story to go back in time to the late aughts, then we will return to this morning.

When we were living in Sherman ("we" being D and me), we'd had a fellow homeschool family over for dinner. Their three kids and my one were alternately playing in D's room and hanging out with us adults. As their departure drew near, the dad went back to get his youngest, Rebekah, from D's room. Rebekah was on D's top bunk, which was very big and only about 2 feet from the ceiling.

Rebekah was talking to her dad over the side of the bunk and said, "Watch this!" She then proceeded to manually turn the fan, whose blades overlapped D's bed by several inches (we never turned the fan on when it was bedtime!). The dad started to reprimand her, then said, "Oh! Dust doesn't fall off of your fan blades." 

I didn't say anything, but the reason it didn't was that I dusted the fan blades every single week.

I dusted everything every single week.

Bookcases, end tables, the fireplace mantle, door frames, air conditioning vents, computers... I dusted once a week, every week.

Coming back to the present time, I have to confess that when I turned the fan off this morning, I was appalled by how much dust was on the blades! I cleaned it, and dust definitely DID sheet off of the blades. It was too much for the wipe to hold, and it all fell to the floor like giant dust-bunny snow.

Things have changed. 

At some point, I stopped my old cleaning routine where Monday was bathrooms/kitchen, Tuesday was dusting, Wednesday was vacuuming, Thursday was sweeping/mopping, and Friday was laundry and catch-up on anything else that needed to be done. 

At some point, I stopped having families over for dinner. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I would *love* for my house to be super clean. I enjoy looking at old pictures and seeing how tidy and spotless everything looked. But I don't have the will or energy anymore.

I don't have a kid who wants to help Swiffer anymore, either!

Also, I remember from the time always feeling "behind" in house-cleaning, like I couldn't keep up. Once, I expressed this frustration to my ex-husband and he said, "The house is never clean, so why are you stressed about it right now?"

I guess maybe I decided to stop worrying about it so much and just sit down and play on the Switch sometimes. I still want my house to be very clean as much as I ever did. I just don't feel like it's possible so I don't strive as much. And consequently, my house gets dusty. If you're ever over and it bothers you, you are more than welcome to fix it!