Things People Say: "Don't Pick Your Nose"

Warning: This post might prove too much to the squeamish. Feel free to move on if that's you.

For the first time that I know of, today when I wasn't around, someone told Mal not to pick his nose.

I do not understand why adults tell kids not to pick their noses.

No, really. Hear me out...

Why *do* adults tell children not to pick their noses? My guess is because it's kind of gross. You know what else is gross? Poop. In fact, I'll go out on a limb to say that feces is even more offensive than the non-Newtonian gel that people have in their nasal passages.

However, we seem to have more patience with developmental stages when it comes to poop than when it comes to boogers.

When a kid is small, they poop indiscriminately wherever they are. No one tells a kid, or any human, really, "Don't poop! It's disgusting!" So we understand that this is a natural, biological activity, and rather than try foolishly to stop it, we help our kids learn the appropriate manner of dealing with their bowel movements.

Why can't we be bothered to do this with nose-picking?

My child, at 3, does not understand the physics of nose-blowing. Until recently, if you gave him a tissue and asked him to blow, he'd hold the tissue up to his nose and make a protracted "ffff" sound with his mouth. Now, he gets that it's pushing air out his nose, but he doesn't have the force or even understand the intention, no matter how I might explain it to him. He'll get there. It's a process.

So if someone sees a kid picking their nose, and it offends the adult's sensibilities: First, if it's not your kid or a kid for whom you are responsible, I'd say just look away and think about something else. If it's a child in your charge, you can do a couple of useful things: 1) Offer a tissue for wiping rather than risk the extricated object ending up in some random place to be discovered later. 2) Provide a wet wipe or take the kid to wash his hands when he's done.

It makes no sense to insist someone stop something that is natural and that relieves discomfort; instead, let's help teach them a more discreet and hygienic way of handling the situation. Also, regardless of how old we are, there are times when stuff is just jammed up there and has to be managed digitally rather than with the force of expelled air. So telling a kid not to pick their nose is incredibly hypocritical.

I don't want people to be ashamed of any of their bodily functions. We've been so for many years, and it's ridiculous. People fart. Women bleed. And sometimes, we need to get some crud out of our noses so we can breathe better.

Be helpful, not unreasonably demanding, 'kay?