I KNOW I said I wasn't going to do a whole post about my hair...

 ... but here's the deal: There's a lot.

First of all, when I realized I was getting some grey hair, back in late 2018, I decided that it was time to stop coloring my hair red and let it grow out. 

My rationale was that I didn't want to be one of those white-headed ladies with obviously fake red hair and shocking white roots.

It took about three to four years, but I was finally able to cut that last bit of dyed hair off and had my natural brown back, with some grey "highlights."

But THEN my hair had started changing into the wavy hair I mentioned a few posts ago. My hair had been absolutely straight, no body at all, my entire life. I guess it's perimenopause hormones, but it made my hair curly. 

Last summer, a hair-dresser misunderstood me when I said I didn't want layers and thought that I wanted my hair to match my "fringe," so she cut about 6 inches off of my length. 

What THAT did was to get rid of the remaining straight hair I had. 

Truth is, I needed that cut but was too much of a wimp to ask for such a drastic cropping.

It's so weird. This wavy hair came out of my head! New hair after half a century!

Well, I realized today that we're in another kind of "grow it out" waiting game.

In summer 2023, I started taking minoxidil. At the time, I assumed that I was losing hair because of perimenopause but now know that hair loss is a symptom of hyperparathyroidism. Regardless, my hair was thinning more than I was comfortable with when my hair was still mostly straight and very fine (it's still fine, but it looks thicker because of the volume).

Now, I figure we have about 18 months until my new growth catches up with the length I am keeping my hair these days.

I'm sure something else weird will happen by then and we'll get to start this process all over.

If there were a PhD in picking up Play-Doh and LEGOs, I'd be a doctor

This post has nothing to do with the title, but it's a true statement and I'm not on social media and do occasionally miss posting the pithy little insight. So there's a freebie for you.

There is an article in Texas Monthly (a great publication to which I highly recommend that you subscribe if you live in Texas or like Texas or even want to hate-follow Texas). It's entitled "Texas Has Shifted to an 'It's Your Responsibility' Pandemic Plan." Which is another true statement. This is my favorite piece: "Responsibility may be personal—but risk is communal. Everyone can both get sick with the virus and pass it on to someone else. A person who gets infected while packed into an overcrowded bar can pass the disease to a supermarket cashier who is otherwise steadfastly avoiding high-risk situations..." I hope everyone remembers this.

We're getting out and about more, but we're also still wearing masks where applicable (inside when we can't keep a distance, or if I have to talk to someone who isn't behind plexiglass, anywhere that there are signs "strongly suggesting" masks, etc.) and keeping our distance.

During the past week, we've been able to enjoy:

1) Zilker Botanical Garden's free admission day.

They were only admitting 100 people every fifteen minutes, but we only saw two groups the whole time we were roaming the 36 acres. And there were cute little signs everywhere, reminding people to keep their distance (not that it was necessary on this day).

2) Jumpstreet, which we had all to ourselves.

I did wear a mask when checking in, and again when I went to buy Mal some apple juice. But we were literally the only patrons there.

Interestingly (to me), we were also at Jumpstreet exactly two years ago to the date.

3) The new swing set at Jones Brothers Park.

It was HOT! But what a gorgeous day!

They also just opened up the playground last weekend... However, Jones Brothers is going to be closing down every Friday-Sunday until further notice, because that place is PACKED to the gills on the weekends. I think it's because it was one of the only public places that stayed open during the Stay Home, Stay Safe orders. The police did announce at the time that they'd be patrolling it and would break up groups, but once the Governor started relaxing things, even more people showed up. And I'm sure the cops don't want to spend their weekends ticking people off, so the city just decided to shut it down. (They also closed it Memorial Day weekend, but this is going to be EVERY weekend until further notice.)

They're leaving the boat ramps open, so you can go and park if you're getting in a boat and spreading out into the lake. At $15 a pop, that makes our town a lot of money, so...

(I just drove by this spot and they now have a lighted sign instead of just this printed thing.)

Since we've been mostly home, I've started a new era in my own hair care. I saw a "Curly Girl Method" video and even though I have stick-straight hair, a couple of the procedures seemed beneficial to me. To that end, I have begun taking "Haiti showers."

In Haiti, in order not to waste water, we took showers as our host family, The Pauls, did: Turn the water on to get wet, collecting some of it in a small bucket that was also in the shower (to rinse out the wash cloth, etc.) and then turn the water off to do things like soap up, scrub down, shampoo, etc. The water is only on when you need it to actively do something. Now, our hosts were quite well-to-do (I couldn't host a team of 15-20 people in my house!) and had an on-demand water heater, which was nice... when the electricity was on, which was never a given.

Jean Alix Paul told us that when he visited the US, he still took "Haiti showers," because he couldn't stand to waste water anywhere. That stuck with me, though I obviously didn't implement it for another almost seven years.

So, combining the inappropriate Curly Girl Method and water-conserving showers, here's what I do the majority of the time when I wash my hair:

1) Turn on the water. Get a wash cloth and my hair very wet.

2) Dispense my shampoo into my hand and emulsify it between my hands in the water.

3) Put the shampoo all over my scalp.

4) Turn off the water as soon as the shampoo is off of my hands.

5) Use what is apparently a dog-scrubber (but you can get the human version everywhere) to make sure the shampoo gets all over my scalp, and use the scrubber to exfoliate my scalp.

6) Wash off my body while the shampoo is sitting there working.

7) Turn on the water to rinse my shampoo and soap.

8) Repeat the shampoo steps, usually.

9) After the second shampoo rinse, turn the water off.

10) Apply conditioner to the parts of my hair that would be in a ponytail (that is, not touching my scalp), then gently comb my hair to distribute the conditioner (if you do this and you're like me, you will lose A LOT of hair... but then it's out and doesn't fall into the food you're cooking or onto the floor to choke your vacuum's beater bar).

11) It's called "noodling," I think. Basically, run my fingers down small strands of hair to feel that it's all smooth and the conditioner has been fully distributed.

12) Shave or finish up washing or just meditate on life to kill a few minutes.

13) Turn the shower back on and rinse everything off (including the comb I used, and any product containers that have shaving cream or sticky fingerprints on the outside... I wouldn't have to do that if I had a bucket, but that is the one piece of the full experience that I have not implemented yet).

My hair has gotten SO much healthier since I started doing this. I've also been able to get one more day between washes. I was washing on every third day and now I do it ever fourth day. And I have what I would consider oily skin and an oily scalp.

But when you use a gentle cleanser (sulfate-free shampoo, or even just conditioner -- see co-wash), it doesn't strip the natural oils from your scalp. Sulfates and other harsh cleansers do, and so your scalp over-produces oil to make up for it.

Once you stop that practice, your scalp calms down and you don't get greasy after a day or two (and if you are edging toward it, dry shampoo is your friend).

Anyway, this has produced the results I really wanted to achieve when I tried using no shampoo a few years ago. By the way, James is still doing no-poo; it worked for his scalp and curls.

AND FINALLY, while we're on the subject of hygiene (yes, we were), I have to note that it's now been over a decade (it was 10 years in January) since I started using a menstrual cup. At the time, I thought it was changing my life... and it DID. I never worry about whether or not to swim or to jump on a trampoline, or to go on a vigorous walk, or whether I'm going to mess up the sheets overnight, or any of that stuff.

I AM READY for menopause. But until then, thank the lord for whomever invented the menstrual cup.

Fin.

Believe me, I know you don't care about my hair

As if I haven't talked about my hair enough already, here are a few more things:

One thing I've started doing, that I have thought about often and recently saw is part of the Curly Girl Method (for which I am in no need, sadly), is sleeping in a satin sleep cap. I'd considered it this past summer as my hair was getting long enough that I was waking up with it wound around my neck and I was sweating terribly. I don't want to sleep with a hair tie in because it's bad for the hair, and it makes a "dent."

So I bought one for $15 from Amazon and have been using it for about a month. It's great! I brush my hair and kind of wind it up then put the hat on right as I go to bed. When I wake up, my hair feels like I JUST brushed it. This came in handy when I slept until the Walmart Grocery Delivery person rang my doorbell the other morning.

In addition to keeping hair from engaging in friction with the pillowcase, the satin lining does not absorb oil like a cotton pillowcase would, so it leaves those oils on my hair. That should help over the long term. As a matter of fact, I bought a second cap today.

Finally, weirdly related in that it's a hair thing... D's paternal grandmother passed away last weekend. I've been thinking about her a lot this week, and one thing I remember vividly about her (besides camp stew and how much she adored her grandkids) was that she would put about half a dozen pin-curls in her hair every night before bed. She had naturally curly/wavy hair, and just had the structured curls framing her face.

When I'd see her do that, I'd think, "That looks impossible," and "I could never sleep with metal pins on my head!" This was before I started using bobby pins as barrettes, so I had no experience on which to draw.

In remembering her this week, I decided to give it a try myself. I only did about 8 curls over my whole head, so they were super chunky sections. I didn't feel the pins at all, and my hair looked pretty cute the next day. It was a lot more predictable and consistent than when I wrap my hair around a headband.

The curls, of course, were downgraded to waves by the middle of the day, because I live in a super humid area. And living in Las Vegas got me out of the habit of using hair spray, so this is to be expected. But what I really loved was that the next two days, my hair had so much volume from the roots. It was very nice not to feel like my hair was just lying, exhausted, over my scalp. I'll definitely try that again.

Lots and Lots of News

Looking back to reference the post I did about not coloring my hair anymore, I was a little shocked to find it was all the way back in June! Can one be "a little shocked"? Anyway, I was surprised. It's been six months! And my hair wasn't awful; the red had washed out and I was left with just some kind of inoffensive orange. It wasn't bad, but it was also noticeably darker than my new growth.

Typically, this wasn't a huge problem. But sometimes, mostly when I was with my parents and so one of them took a picture in which I was bent down talking to Mal, so that all of my hair fell forward... well, there was a lot of roots going on.

I LOVE THE ROOTS. It is this sable brown with the occasional silver strand. I did not love the contrast of the colors, which most people assured me was not grotesque. I think I've been helped by the fact that dark roots are in fashion right now (I even noticed that in the final Descendants movie, the kids with purple and blue hair also had... black roots. They did not in the first two films; it was all color all the way.)

Anyway, I was fortunate enough to get some input from my neighborhood on NextDoor and found Megan at Hair's to You.

A hair salon in an RV, you say? Perfect for me! Long story short, here's the final product. Hopefully the brown will stay with me for months to come. We just used a color-depositing dye, no stripping, and she didn't color ALL of the top layer, so my washed-out color kind of acts as highlights.

Here's a picture of me last week versus today. Again, not looking at the crown, it's not as dramatic as the reality; you'll just have to trust me.

Also, because I think the second picture, which has a noticeably-darker under-layer (which I dig), is still a little light, here's another angle. The one above was taken during daylight, and the other later at night. You get an idea of how much darker it is here.

Okay! Enough pictures of me!

In other news, our heater gave up the ghost last night.

That's not entirely true. It works-ish. What happened was that it got VERY cold (and snowed!) and after cycling nonstop between the heat pump and auxiliary heat, it froze up and shut down. When that happens, apparently our stupid Nest "smart" thermostat doesn't charge because its charging relies on the heater or a/c to be functional (??!!). SO we woke up in a cold house and with no thermostat. I quick-charged it a few minutes with a USB cable, checked the breakers (they were fine), and then plugged the thermostat back in.

It was 58 degrees in the house, and the heater came on when the thermostat was back in working order. It stayed on so long, though, that it drained the battery of the thermostat very quickly, and so I started doing a little routine. I'd set the heater to one degree above whatever it was. When it caught up, I'd take the thermostat off and plug it in a few minutes. Then I'd put the thermostat back on and raise the temperature another degree.

Doing that, I got it back up to 68 in a few hours. I could tell, too, that the heater had gone out at about 2:00 AM, so it did work part of the night.

We've known that we needed to replace the unit. It's had an inordinate amount of problems since we bought the house (like the a/c guy shouldn't need to come out twice a year... something I learned after we replaced the inside unit of our heater in Sherman, too... we'd sunk SO MUCH money into repairs), so last December, we'd gotten an estimate to replace it and had budgeted to do it in November.

However, I did not want to repair what happened last night, because I don't think it's fixable long-term. Additionally, the unit is old enough that the refrigerant can no longer be sold as of January, so if we got a leak, we'd be at the mercy of hoping someone had some left over in their inventory. Also, there's some questionable repairs already done, like someone installed some kind of jumper that is only supposed to be there temporarily, but since it works, the serviceman hasn't wanted to mess with it. I'm pretty sure it's original to the house, which was built in 2007.

So, on Monday we're getting a new heat pump. Hey, did I mention spending a ton of money recently? Oh, and the company has a 12-months-same-as-cash finance deal going, so we can actually pay for it in November and that will be cool. I know a lot of people caution against "same-as-cash" offers (and the interest rate is 18% after that!) but we WILL pay it off within a year.

Finally, I've been thinking a lot about a vacation we're taking later this year in which we'll be flying. We don't fly often; I think we've averaged once a year since we've been married, and I had only flown once in five years or so before that. I understand the environmental impact of flying is high, even though I've never seen a breakdown of how it differs from driving if you have to top two nights and stay in a hotel where linens have to be washed, etc. I always just see a gas comparison.

Anyway, when I was trying unsuccessfully to find a comparison of ALL of the associated factors, I came across an article on how to lower your impact if you do "have" to fly. One tip was to take a nonstop flight, which we are doing. I basically will not take a trip, especially with a kiddo, if I have to layover. I realize that if we ever want to go to Montreal, we'll probably have to (or we could drive, but that seems like torture). But, anyway. So we're good on that front.

The person who wrote the article also mentioned that you can go online and calculate the carbon footprint of your flight (ours is just under 2.5 cubic tons -- YIKES). I found a couple of reputable places where you can buy carbon offsets for different projects, and I did that. They have a lot of them that recapture methane from landfills, but a lot of those were fully funded. We did one that helps clean up boreholes in Rwanda so that water doesn't have to be boiled before people can drink it.

I heard on the radio today, specifically regarding airlines, that they're going to have to change how they operate. The lady said, "They can't just buy carbon offsets and continue to do business as usual..." And I realize this about our lives, too. It maddens me beyond belief when politicians point to the economic impact of things like the Green New Deal as a reason not to support it. Reversing the climate impacts we've wrought on the earth will take sacrifice from people like myself who are imminently accustomed to being comfortable. I get that. I'm willing to do it. Our economy is not more important than the poorest of people who cannot deal with increasing temperatures. They don't deserve to die so our GDP stays high.

All of THAT to say that we will be looking more seriously at future trips and might forego flying at all (though we did put a deposit down on a vacation in 2022 that requires a flight... and we might just forfeit the deposit? We'll have to see), but the carbon offset is a way to mitigate it a bit for the time being.

Also, the new heat pump is more efficient, so even though we're on all green energy at the moment (even with the stuff we buy from PEC), in case the next owners aren't, that'll be something, too.

#workinprogress

A little assumption to think about...

Today, I got my hair trimmed. While I did, Mal stayed in the foyer area playing with their Lego Duplos and chatted up the two people who were waiting their turns in the barber's seat, specifically a very young adult.

While the lady cut my hair, she made small talk and remarked on Mal's imagination and cleverness. And, of course, his hair. She did call him a girl. A lot. Despite the fact that I said "he/him" and called him "buddy" numerous times. She just didn't pick up on it.

At one point, she asked if he was in school. I said, "Well, his birthday is in late September, so he wouldn't be starting kindergarten until next year, anyway, but we homeschool."

Without any further information, she said, "Oh, I know we like to protect our kids, but they need to get out there and be social with each other."

Um.

Many things to unpack here.

The very first is the assumption that we homeschool for protection. That's nowhere on the list. But I'll get back to that.

The other thing was that she was observing in literally the sentence before this that he was so fun and interactive with everyone. And he's never been to school. So wouldn't it make sense that we'd provide alternate opportunities for him to socialize, not only with children his own age, but with a wide variety of human beings and maybe even animals?

Back to why we homeschool.

The reasons are many, but the top two "not on the list" reasons are: protection from the ideas/influence of peers, and the very absolutely NOTHING TO DO WITH why we homeschool is that we perceive it to be "better" or to give a leg up academically, or help our kids be "more advanced" than other kids their age, etc.

Today, I got this ad in a break for a game and I thought, "They have no idea with whom they're dealing."

We don't need our kids to have higher test scores than anyone else. They're not in competition with anyone else: not their siblings, not other homeschooled kids, not private or public schooled kids. It's not a race, where whoever reads best at the age of 5 wins.

Also, specifically, regarding the above ad: Show me that what you're doing makes kids LOVE reading, and maybe I'd be interested. I got high test scores in most things when I was in school. I hated math and history. Test scores were not an arbiter of mastery over time or of interest. So mehh to your advertisement. My kid might be the gray rocket, struggling to achieve escape velocity. That's okay. Most people get there eventually.

It has always bothered me when people tout homeschooling as a "superior" choice to traditional schooling because of how freaking awesome the homeschooled kids turn out. Honestly, most kids turn out pretty cool, and unless you're one of those people for whom a particular schooling method just messes you up, most kids find a way to be excited about and still learn what they truly want to learn, anyway.

So why *do* we homeschool?

I just realized that I can't speak for James. But I don't think he's super vicariously competitive with our kids, either. Anyway, one big reason I started homeschooling D, after considering it for a couple of years, was that D had already mastered everything taught in kindergarten when the time finally came. D's birthday is in November, and at almost six, had already been reading for a good year and a half (we won't be able to say that about Mal, and that's just fine; he can do some math that D could not at this age... again, it's not a competition). It seemed like a waste of D's time, and probably a pain in the teacher's butt, honestly.

Then the more I thought about the time: organizing kids, disciplining a group, getting from point A to point B... just ask a teacher how much actual forward momentum their class has per day, and I'm going to guess they'd say a couple of hours. So it made sense to let D work a couple of hours per day, and then be free to pursue whatever.

The same holds true for Mal.

Maybe most people won't say that time management is the main reason they homeschool, but that's really the number one factor for me. I don't have to drive to/from a school. I don't have to wake up and herd kids at the crack of dawn. My kids don't have to wait for other kids to calm down if they're raring to do something. My kids don't hold anyone else back if they're feeling restless or don't understand something. It's just more efficient. We go on vacation when everyone else is in school, so we don't deal with crowds and lines and headaches like that. I get as much time with my kids as they or I can handle (we all needs breaks, variously). We can move through zoos, aquariums, and museums as slowly or quickly as we want. We can go see a movie when no one else is available. We can stay out late because we don't have to get up at a certain time most mornings. It's all about time.

There are other reasons homeschooling works for our family, but sheltering my kids from outside ideas or people or dangers isn't one of them. Neither is giving them "every advantage." Really, I want them to be happy, peaceful, and fulfilled, as I'm sure most parents want for their kids. That's it.

Getting Old(er), Changing It Up

My body is tired of some stuff, guys, and I'm going to have to do things differently.

Lately, whenever I wear eyeliner, I have to use eyedrops. My eyes itch, they're dry, and I just can't wait to take it off. Yes, all eyeliner. Yes, even THAT eyeliner. I've tried them all. And I LOVE how "awake" I look and how it opens up my eyes when I wear eyeliner. But I think I have to be done with it.

This week, I've just used dark eye shadow at the eyelash line, and, while it's not perfect, it's been fine. At least I won't have to worry about whether it's run or flaked off? Sigh.

Another thing is my hair. It keeps getting so dried out and I will find and use a fairly expensive shampoo/conditioner that I love... for about a year, then I have to move on because my hair goes back to being crunchy hay and it's just no good.

After three years of this cycle, I have actually purchased a product from an MLM, which, if you know me, you know I AVOID. My friend's house-cleaning wipes were a pleasant surprise, so maybe this will be, too.

Beyond that, I might have made a half-decision (like kind of made it, but not overly committed to it yet). After twenty years, I think I might stop coloring my hair. I am sure my hair won't take it forever without just falling right out. It's been a good, LONG, run.

I did take a two-year-break at one point because I was super heavy, and for some reason decided that not having red hair would draw less attention to my fat body? And I also decided that bangs might help me look cuter. IT. WAS. A. MISTAKE. If you're a person who doesn't have bangs, but you're thinking about getting bangs: DO NOT GET BANGS.

Also, "trying to look less fat" is a vapid and needless pursuit, but I won't get on that soapbox at the moment.

Anyhoo, the color wasn't bad, but I ended up going back to red a couple of years later (and after my bangs had grown back out).

The color I have now is fading so subtly, it seems like I *might* be able to just let it grow out? We'll see. It might be more noticeable when the roots are 2 inches instead of 1/4 inch.

Now... another thing. I love where we live. LOVE IT. That said, I don't think I ever want to buy a house again.

Last Friday night, at 6:48 PM, our lawn mower (a human, not the machine) noticed that we had a pinhole leak in the pipe in the ground right behind our water meter. We got it fixed quickly (yay!) but it was $400.

Tonight at 10, we noticed our air conditioner wasn't working. The repair guy came out, but guess what? It's an electric problem, not an a/c problem! The electrician can get here shortly after 10 in the morning, so it won't be *too* hot. But still. Ugh. Oh, and it was $150 for the a/c service call. For nothing. I mean, I guess we did get some information, And I don't begrudge paying the dude for coming out (with his wife in the car; she was his girlfriend last time he made a late-Friday-night call, back in September when we were at Disney World and my parents and D handled it).

In short, being old is kind of awesome, but comes with some "mature" expenses and weird body changes that I'm sure have only barely begun, since I haven't started menopause yet.

Good times.

A final word on the "no poo" experiment...

Since my last post, I've been using the Kevin Murphy angel.wash and angel.rinse. I love them! First, there are no "lathering" agents in them, so my hair doesn't get hugely sudsy. But, goodness, it's light and CLEAN!

I've realized that my hair didn't fall out when I "washed" it and was using only water, though I didn't notice it at the time. Maybe that's because it all just glopped together and none was able to escape? The first time I used shampoo in six weeks, it was very noticeable. It's not excessive; it just made me note that I hadn't had hair fall out during the experiment.

Fortunately, I think that, if nothing else, the "experiment" kind of got my scalp out of the over-production of sebum. I went one week between washes the first time I used the shampoo. Now that it's getting hotter and so muggy, I'm washing it every three days or so, but I recently washed it the second day after I'd sanded some furniture and felt disgusting.

Perhaps most interesting is this: My husband, when I first told him what I was planning to do, immediately stopped using shampoo. It took me about a week to gather the supplies I needed, but he just went cold turkey. He has a very dry scalp and typically used dandruff shampoo.

His hair has thrived on the water-washing regimen. He washes it every two to four days, and it did go through an oily time at the beginning. But now, man, it looks (and smells!) great. He said his scalp itches less, too. I'm glad it worked out for him, so I'm glad I decided to try it.

Actually, it benefited both of us, as I'm really loving the feel of my hair with this shampoo I'd not have tried if I hadn't been doing so much research.

Six weeks... that was all I could take!

After having made it to the "half way" mark of my eight week trial run with no shampoo, I was starting to crack.

My hair felt, not oily per se, but just like it had conditioner in it at the scalp and for the first four inches or so, all of the time. On the upside, it made my hair a lot thicker. The sock bun was a lot easier than it had been when my hair was finer. I liked it that there was some unexpected wave coming out... Like this:

Apparently when my hair isn't weighted down by gunk, it's actually kind of wavy. I hadn't figured out how to use that to my advantage yet, but it helped hold wavy curl like this style for a few days.

However. I was so tired of always having to strategize my hair. I couldn't shower and just leave it. I had to blow it out a bit or it'd just lie flat on my head. I couldn't just get up in the morning and brush it, because it would adhere to itself, leaving big gaping holes at my scalp (something I promised myself I'd never let happen, as I used to tell my Mema, "Get a mirror and look at the back! I can see your naked head!").

I'd scratch up around my scalp, and my fingernails didn't look oily. it wasn't oily. It was just... icky. And I was getting tired of messing with it. It wasn't getting worse before it got better; it seemed to have stagnated at four weeks and it seemed that was as bad/good as it was going to get.

But while the top looked like this, my ends were getting strawy. They needed some love, and, dang it, that sebum wasn't getting down there. I'd tried coconut oil and cocoa butter, but both weren't much for leaving the ends brush-through ready. It made THEM clump together, too.

So, what's a girl to do?

I took to the internet. Again.

The reason my hair was dried out and was because of my messing with the pH balance using the products I was using, right? So, I wondered (and James and I talked about it) what is the pH of your hair? This article from Wikihow is pretty interesting. I wasn't sure where to go from there, but I knew I wasn't up to buying strips to test cleaners.

Fortunately, this person did that for me a few years ago. Actually, she called manufacturers. Then she also made this list of the gentlest to harshest sulfate-free shampoos, pointing out that the gentlest cleaned the worst.

But the thing that made the most sense to me was this "ask the stylist" blog entry about not using shampoo. It's really good. Even if you skipped the other links, if you're interested in "no poo" and why it might not work for you like it didn't seem to work for me, it is a wealth of information.

So I took her advice and looked around the Kevin Murphy site, then found Angel.Wash and Angel.Rinse, specifically formulated for fine, colored hair. I love how they list every ingredient (or "key" ingredients) and why they're in there. I called around and found The Beauty Store Salon and Spa had it, but only had a couple of 8-ounce washes left, so we hurried over Saturday after breakfast.

First off, cute store! I want to go back when my husband and baby aren't waiting in the van, because they have some neat Austin memorabilia and gift-type things. Second, I went ahead and got 8-ounce washes and rinses, because I want to make sure they're going to work with my hair. They were $27.50 each, and so will be much "cheaper" if/when I can buy the liter bottles for $69.

I didn't have time to mess with my hair this weekend, so mostly rolled it up in a bun. But yesterday... I was done. 

Yeah. I don't wear hats. So this morning...

Will let you know how it goes!

Transitioning from Shampoo, Part 1

My hair has been four to five inches longer than it is right now in the past, but for the most recent several years, I haven't been able to grow it out. As soon as I get some length, it's dead and I need to cut it off to keep my hair healthy.

Because of this, I decided to try to us zero hair product, aside from coloring every 6-8 weeks, and see if maybe that would help. There's a whole philosophy behind not using shampoo, and it's explained all over the internet, so I'm not going to do that here. There's a lot of good information, documentation, and an explanation of why on this lady's blog.

Like her, I decided I was going to try to use only water. I'm not ethically opposed to shampoo; if I wanted to clarify my hair, I'd just use shampoo. My experiment was to try to use only water and see if I could get my sebum production down to normal, and have that condition my hair. I decided to give it eight weeks and see what happened. We're just about half way through.

Four weeks ago, on March 21, I colored my hair and used coconut oil on the tips instead of the conditioner that came with the color. The reason I did this was that I knew the color had stripped my hair and I did not want to put product on top of it again. When you wash with just water, it can't strip the silicone or something, it's been a long time since I read it. Anyway, I wanted to start with clean hair.

The coconut oil was interesting. I think I used too much and it coated too much of my hair shaft. I should have just dabbed it onto the ends. As it was, we had some rare dry weather in Austin and my roots and associated hair had static electricity, but the ends did not. It was weird.

I waited two days then went in for a cut. I had her shampoo but not condition my hair, and put no product in it. Please excuse these pictures. I haven't really documented it except on Snapchat with my crappy phone camera. You know, toddlers and such.

Right after the cut.

I bought a boar bristle brush and made it two days before I felt like I needed to use that to try to coax some of the oils down from my scalp to the hair. It was fine. I could tell that there wasn't as much oil at the scalp. It actually wasn't as awful as I thought it would be, because usually, I have to wash my hair every other or every third day at the least.

Toward the end of the week, I started searching the internet for "dirty" hairstyles. I learned a couple of things: 1) The models in those tutorials have clean hair. 2) And/or, the models in those tutorials have thick hair. I found a couple that worked okay for me.

After that, I pretty much used the boar hair brush every day. I also got a bamboo comb.

On March 30, after a week, I did my first water wash. It was *SO MUCH WORSE* after I washed it! I think I didn't scrub at the scalp enough, and it was just clumpy and icky. Two days later, it started calming down a little bit. The third day, though, I used my "dry shampoo" for the first time: 1 part cocoa powder (since my hair's dark) and 1 part corn starch. It seemed to lift the roots a bit, so that was nice. Plus it smells gently of chocolate.

This was probably my favorite style. It was easy and looked fancy. I actually pulled out earrings, too.

Okay, so this next picture... I was illustrating the difference in thick hair and my fine hair. First, I took the picture with my phone's "real" (outward-facing) camera and, gosh, the quality is so much better! Anyway... Here's the tutorial that shows what it's supposed to look like. Here's what mine looked like.

It doesn't cover nearly as much scalp as the other picture. Because... I don't have *that* much hair.

For the second water wash, I "scritched" a LOT, and spent some time in the shower really scrubbing and trying to pull the oil through my hair. Oh, I'm also doing the last rinse in cold water, so... brr. This time, my husband was home, so I had time to blow dry the roots before we headed out on vacation.

Everyone says, "I can't even tell!" but I think that in this picture, you can totally tell. Of course, it was also the day before the third water wash.

Basically, now, my hair's not super oily, like I thought it might be. It's just different. And I don't like it. It feels like there's product in it, like if you sleep with conditioner in your hair for a good, deep condition. Only in this case, it feels like I didn't rinse it out. I brush my hair and it looks okay, though a little oily at the roots. Then later, it calms down at the roots but the next six to eight inches seems to glop together, and it makes little cracks and holes in my wig, if you know what I'm saying.

I am definitely going to give it eight weeks to see if the oil spreads all the way through and my scalp stops overproducing sebum, but if it is no better than it is today, I might go back to shampoo. Then again, I'll probably need to color it again around then and that should strip everything. Hopefully it won't send my scalp into overproduction again, or we'll have a vicious cycle I can only battle with soap.

Today, for the first time, I hot-rolled my hair. I haven't used these curlers since Mal was born, and it's literally 100% humidity, but at least it gave my hair a little lift.

The last time I washed was Friday morning, and so I'm still the better part of a week away from washing it again. Or "washing" it again. Stay tuned for Part 2, coming in a few weeks...

Review: Several dry shampoos; which is the best?

Here's the thing about my hair: I have to "fix" it. I wish I had the kind of hair I could just wash and walk out the door... and I do that on occasion. But I rarely feel "put together" in that case. Before the baby, I would heat-roll my hair every other day or so. Sometimes, I'd use big chunky rollers. Sometimes I'd use the old Benders. And on occasion, I'd use a very small ceramic wand for super ringlets.

Since Mal was born, I don't use a lot of heat on it as I shampoo at night and typically wrap my hair in a headband so it's not just stick straight. I mean, I wish it were sleek and stick straight, and I'd be happy. Instead, it's knotted log made of hay straight.

Regardless, my hair needs something. But it is also, due both to processing and apparently just to my biology, very dry. If I shampooed my hair every day, it'd be adding insult to injury. Unfortunately, my scalp isn't dry at all. It tends to get oily and make me feel very ookey if I go more than one day without washing it.

A few years ago, I bought my first dry shampoo. It was Not Your Mother's Clean Freak, and there was a learning curve.

I think I was holding it too close or spraying too long or something at first. I'd follow the directions and end up smelling great but looking like I was a teenager playing an old person in a play. You know... like I'd powdered my hair? Even if I waited a few minutes. Even after I'd brushed. I still had "hot" roots.

To remedy that, I tried this: Beyond the Zone's Rock On dry shampoo for "medium to dark hair."

It didn't leave my roots gray, but I also didn't fell like it absorbed as much of the oil.

By the way, that's basically the point of dry shampoos. I mean, besides fresh smell: It contains either alcohol or a starch that absorbs oil from your scalp, making your hair look and smell cleaner than without.

For myself, a person with fine hair, it also adds a little volume, which is nice, as one of the added effects of oily hair is that it plasters itself down on my skull.

My sister experimented at one time with using straight up talcum powder and cinnamon once, and I think she was pleased enough with it. I have enough trouble spraying, so I can't imagine trying trying to sprinkle powder evenly on my head. (Also, she said that the powder absorbed and basically disappeared, but at the end of the day she still had cinnamon in her hair.)

Finally, I'd heard that Dove has a dry shampoo. It's slightly less expensive that NYM and quite a bit less expensive than BTZ.

I'm pleased to announce that it's actually my favorite! And because it's so readily available, I can get it via Instacart when I'm buying groceries... err, someone else is buying me groceries. Oh, and I need to do a post on Instacart, while I'm at it. That'll be coming soon. :)

Bottom line: Dry shampoo is great for a day or two when you either can't or don't want to dry your hair out by (ironically) shampooing it. And Dove is the least expensive and my favorite. Just hold the can 6 inches from your head, use your free hand to pull your hair away from your head to get to your scalp around your hair line especially, and try to wait more than the two minutes recommended before you brush your hair out. But don't forget to brush it before you leave the house.

Review: The Cutting Room, Austin, TX

Several months ago, my daughter decided to get her first "real" hair cut... meaning, an actual style rather than just trimming up the ends as we have done her entire life until now. Both because I do mystery shopping and am often offered quicky-chain-salon jobs and because it's difficult for the cheap-o in me to justify paying more than $15 or so to have split ends chopped, we've always gone the quick and dirty route.

For this major change, though, I wanted someone who would take time, talk to Daphne, want to see her happy, and was in our neighborhood... Shopping local is a pretty big deal and one of the benefits of living as close as we do to everything. And, honestly, it's a luxury that my dear husband works very hard to afford us.

So, I called and made an appointment at The Cutting Room, which is easy walking distance from our house. Since I didn't know anyone who works there, we had no preference, and ended up with Melanie. As it turns out, she was the perfect fit for Daphne.

The Cutting Room last Christmas season.

And again on the spring day we visited.

One of the coolest things about The Cutting Room is that they have a back bathroom full of robes for you to choose from. Daphne picked out a pretty standard "hair cutting" cape, but when we went back and I got my hair cut, I picked a purple silk that looked like a kimono. I seriously wanted to bring it home. One lady in the salon when we were there the first time had on a hippy muumuu. There are literally dozens to choose from, so that's fun.

Melanie sat Daphne down, looked at her head, talked to her about what she wanted to do, and showed her the plan before moving her back to the sinks for a shampoo.

This is an Aveda concept salon, so all of the product is Aveda. And smells delicious.

After shampoo and conditioning, Melanie cut a ponytail long enough to qualify for Pantene's Pony Up! Beautiful Lengths hair donation. Locks of Love requires 10 inches, but Pantene only needs 8.

Immediately when the ponytail came off, Daphne already looked more like... Daphne. It's weird. Shorter hair suits her personality *so* much better.

Next came the cutting. So. much. cutting. Melanie was meticulous, measuring and eyeballing and working with some "fun" quirks Daphne's hair has. The end result was beautiful.

We wanted a few highlights, so Melanie put in some foils, carefully avoiding some damaged and vulnerable hair. She basically framed Daphne's face.

It's easy to enjoy the pretty view while waiting for the color to set.

While we were waiting for the processing, Melanie showed Daphne the bright colors of highlights that they can do, so Daphne could think about them in case she decided she wanted a purple or blue or something more drastic later.

In the end, Melanie was disappointed that the highlights didn't "pop" as much as she wanted them to. I thought it looked great and very natural. She asked to take an "after" picture of D to add to her Instagram portfolio, and I promised to send her a "before."

Daphne, stoically enduring the modeling preparations.

Her "before" is the top right. This style works really well for her, and she recently took to wearing a beanie most of the time, so basically she just has a bit of hair sticking out from the hat, which she loves.

Melanie didn't charge us full price for the highlights since she wasn't happy with them (even though I was), and offered to "fix" it next time we came in. We did go back two months later to get the cut evened out, but since D is wearing a hat most of the time, anyway, told the stylist not to worry about any more highlights for now. Even though it was just a maintenance trim, Daphne's clean-up took about 40 minutes. I appreciate the time and care dedicated to making clients look their best.

When D went in last time, I made an appointment for myself, as well. I needed a good trim, and I have very fine damaged hair that is in layers. Melanie did a great job with straightening everything out so that it looks healthy enough that I don't feel like I have to style it every day, so I can give it a rest.

One thing I really love is that a couple of the hair-dressers here asked about my hair color... and not one of them lectured me about coloring it at home. I've had employees at Super Cuts tell me that my hair will fall out if I don't let them professionally color it, or tell me that I'll never have healthy hair because I'm ruining it by using home color. The fact is, coloring hair at home might be worse on it than having someone custom mix and watch the process, but I cannot afford that every six weeks. I prefer not to be bawled out at the salon when all I want is to get my hair cut!

We were really pleased with everything about our visits to The Cutting Room. In fact, walking home after the initial cut, Daphne said, "I wish I could have better expressed my appreciation." So I'm expressing our appreciation by recommending The Cutting Room, and Melanie specifically. Go check them out!

Review: Vidal Sassoon Pro Series Runway Red

The thing about home-coloring red hair (according to people who do that kind of thing) is that if the color is a little light, it is strawberry blonde at first, and after a few shampoos, just blonde with some orange highlights. If the color is too dark, it starts purple (not pretty, Day-Glo purple, either... just a blackish dark "auburn" that's really a flat, ugly purple) and fades to a brown with some red highlights, if you're lucky.

If a girl (or guy) wants red hair, she (he) wants it red, dagnab it! But novelty colorings like Manic Panic (or its inferior, cheaper cousin, Splat) are both extremely messy and will stain tile and other surfaces permanently. Plus, they look amazing at first, but after a week of washings, they start to fade and after three weeks, they just look sad and flat, and if you don't keep touching them up, it's like an old manicure that would have looked better if you'd just left your nails naked (which is what I do because ain't this girl got time for that).

So you can imagine my excitement when I saw this at Walgreen's last night!

Dude, that is *red*.

When I first started coloring my hair, I always said that I wanted a color that exists in nature, but over time, I've grown fond of a little too red to be true. I know I can only get that for a couple of weeks, but since tomorrow is Valentine's Day, at least I'd have some construction-paper red hair for that day, right? Plus, with the gentle chocolate shampoo and conditioner, maybe I'll have some luck keeping the color strong for a while.

This dye is typical for drugstore dye, which is $10.99. Some colors were on sale for $8.99, but not this one.

There was nothing special in the box. Development creme, color mix, after-color weekly conditioner, and gloves. Oh, and the gloves are elastic, not the fast-food one-shape clear gloves, so they're easy to work with.

After I mixed the dye, which was a bright orange (always a good sign), I started applying it and was pleased by how "dry" it was. It didn't drip, it wasn't "goopy." It was easy to apply and I didn't get any drops or anything on the floor, or my hair-color sports bra, or anywhere else that I did not want dye.

Since my existing color was quite a bit darker than the hair color, I went ahead and colored everything at once instead of just doing the root touch-up and then the rest of the hair shortly.

See? Super dry. It didn't weigh my hair down, and my hair didn't want to fall off of my head. Also, the dye did not smell bad. It didn't smell good, either, but neutral is better than suffocating.

When it was time to rinse it, the dye liquefied quickly and rinsed out easily. The rinse water started out deep, bright orange, which was a good sign. When it's purple, it makes me a little nervous. The conditioner was silky.

The color looked very bright even when my hair was wet. Once it dried, it looked like this.

I love it! I can't wait to see how the color holds up over the next few weeks. I'm tempted to go back to that Walgreen's and clean them out of this color. I've never seen it before, and actually just looked online to see that it's not even available on Amazon.com. It *is* available here, on drugstore.com. They also have London Lilac, and I'm tempted to order one of those. For Easter, maybe? I'll let you know!