Christmas Baking

Last week, I spent most of Wednesday baking. First, allow me to say this:

I needed this much butter.

My plan was to make spritz cookies to decorate and trade for Cookie Day, and then to make some chocolate peppermint pull-apart bread to take to our small group Christmas White Elephant exchange.

The recipes I used for the spritz cookies (and the main reason for so. much. butter.) were both from Allrecipes. There was a chocolate spritz batch and a Swedish spritz batch. They are both good recipes. For some reason, the green dough was a little more moist than the reddish (in which I used MORE food coloring because I only had pink, not red, and was trying to darken it up a bit by adding purple then added yellow to bring it back toward orange from blue), so my "trees" looked more like amorphous vaguely-triangular blobs. Then again, they were the first ones I tried, and I hadn't used a cookie press in years. Perhaps if I'd gone back and tried them again at the end...

Speaking of the cookie press, when I taught a chocolate class to homeschoolers quite a few years ago, one of the students sold me her press for $5 because she never used it. I love it and I think about her every time I make spritz cookies!

Ready to decorate! (Or not, if you'd prefer them plain. They're great like this!)

For the bread, I used the Chocolate Peppermint Pull-Apart recipe from Hello Giggles, a website that is not typically about baking and does not, I think proofread the recipes.

So, this recipe makes a very delicious finished product, but I would add:

1) At the beginning, to proof the yeast, you use 1/2 cup of the sugar.

2) Before you add the flour to the yeast mixture, sift/whisk/stir in the other dry ingredients (baking soda and powder, and salt).

The picture on the site doesn't look hugely appetizing, and neither do mine. But trust me that this is really good stuff.

Here it is before I cut it. The recipe says to roll it out to 1/4 inch thickness, but that was not happening for me. I rolled it for thirty minutes and got that "post-push-ups" feeling. I ended up with great chunks of chocolate bread, which I think is okay. It cuts through the sweetness of the "filling," so it isn't treacly.

The recipe mentions that you might have some squares left over. I felt like it was plenty to make two loaves.

I had folded the dough over on itself several times and let it rest for a few moments, trying to control the shape and the size. I love the way it rose, with layers like this.

I do think that I made the glaze too thick, but it was still delicious!

Then, the next day, I decorated the spritz cookies. (The first loaf was gone already!)

Downtown Christmas, Visit 2

Last night, Daphne and I walked down to see the window art installments on 2nd Street. While the displays are nothing like, say the downtown New York City department store vignettes (or, really, even the downtown Dallas Macy's windows we saw last year), they were still pretty cool, and we saw a lot of festive things.

One thing I noticed as I was uploading these (and I had to ditch a couple of photos) is that the dark/night pictures look fine digitally, on the camera and on my computer, but then when I upload them (to here or Picasa or anywhere else I've tried so far), they get very pixelated. I'm guessing that the sites upload a lower-quality version to save on bandwidth, but I can't figure out how to make it upload the hi-def version, so you're going to have to trust me when I tell you that I got some neat pictures that you're just not going to get to see.

Not many lights, but the agave is creatively adorned.

Christmas boots. Anything is better than Christmas shoes.

Stopped by the Capitol to see if there was a tree or anything, but apparently that might be culturally insensitive.

No Christmas trees, but the doors are beautiful.

The Capitol Christmas tree, as the music program was starting.

World-famous 6th Street, halls decked.

The Driskell Hotel.

Daphne hadn't seen the gingerbread village yet, so we stopped by Four Seasons.

A Christmas tree in a corner office or condo. Thought about taking my monopod; next time. :)

I was taking a picture up Congress from Cesar Chavez, then Daphne yelled at me to go because the light was turning.

The lobsters were bedazzled.

This whole scene was made out of clothes! The waves were jeans, the shark was dress shirts. His teeth were high heels.

Toy Joy used to be up near us to the north, but now it's on 2nd Street. It's a really fun store!

On the roof of an outdoor concert venue near our house.

Another succulent display.

Another open letter...

Sometimes, when I hear a certain song, or I see an odd post on Facebook, or get into a conversation with someone about my story, I think about you. I thought about you last night, and my chest hurt a little bit and I hoped and prayed that your heart is at peace.

When I was going through a particularly rough time in my life, you reached out to me. You were asked to, and you did. You listened to me. Your advice was quiet and gentle. I appreciate all of those things. I have always appreciated you, and the smiles you have for everyone, and your gracious presence. You never demand attention. You are supportive and encouraging. You are a great example for me.

But you were wrong about one thing. At least you were wrong for me, and I hope to God that you were overstating the situation as it plays out in your life, too.

"... and... life pretty much sucks, anyway, so..."

You shrugged.

In absolute love, both for me and for Jesus, you gave me advice with this caveat.

But life *doesn't* suck.

It isn't supposed to.

It can be difficult. It can be senseless to our limited vision. It can be frustrating, and maddening, and hurtful, and exhausting. But, especially for those of us who try, however messily, to submit our lives to the Lord, there's always an undercurrent of peace that doesn't make sense. Of "abundant life" that has zero to do with how much money is in the bank, or how healthy we are, or anything that can be physically grasped.

Besides that, life can be beautiful, and unreasonably generous, and magical, and reassuring, and celebratory, and all of that.

When I wake up in the middle of the night, still holding hands with my husband, it strikes me how incredibly wonderful this life is.

When I look across the dining room table to see each member of my family trying to figure out which card to play next, I'm overwhelmed by the greatness of the here and now.

Oh, yes, I have a hope that goes beyond the temporary... but I also have a rich existence that is wondrous and glorious... and life *doesn't* "pretty much suck, anyway." It's miraculous moment after miraculous moment, and I hope I never take any of them for granted.

I sincerely wish for you that your words were not a genuine description of how you feel about your world. I want so much for you to experience the goodness of this life. I hope that you are.

Fun with the City of Austin Utilities

When we came back from the Weekend of Weird Al, it was to find a letter in our mailbox from the water company. Rather than going into the whole back story, I'll first post a letter that I wrote them pretty immediately:

Patricia Muriada

Austin Water Utility

Customer Service Division

P.O. Box 1088

Austin, TX 78767

RE: Account No. ************* incorrect meter registering

Dear Ms. Muriada:

This weekend, I received your letter dated September 24, 2013 and postmarked October 18, 2013, informing me that my water meter had not been registering my water use from February 7, 2013 through July 31, 2013; that a new meter had been installed on July 31, 2013; and that I was being back-billed for six months' usage, estimations based on what the letter called “subsequent consumption.” I was informed that I owed the city $246.42, that I could set up a payment plan, and that I only had until December 24, 2013 to file an appeal or question the calculations.

My first issue is that more than three weeks of my limited response time were used by the delay in mailing. I called and left phone messages twice today and did not hear back from you. As of today, my account is showing that I have a balance past due, and I object to that, as I pay my utility bills upon receipt. Marking a bill I only received yesterday as “past due” reflects negatively and places all of my utilities in jeopardy.

Thus, my first request is that you remove the past-due charges from my account while this matter is investigated. I intend to pay in full the utility bill I will receive early next week, but am contesting this and do not want any funds applied to the alleged balance.

My second issue is that I am unable to find in writing the regulations of the water department. Thus, I would like a copy of the procedure for your billing and collecting on erroneous meter readings, specifically the time limits for which you can back-bill, and the method by which you calculate supposed usage.

Ideally, you would recognize a failure by your own equipment, install new equipment, and start charging me for my usage from that point on. The malfunctioning of your meter did indeed cause an “inconvenience” to me, as I pay my bills on time and in full, have zero debt, and am now having to deal with an unexpected charge that should have been avoided. I find it difficult to believe that there is not some way to electronically flag an account that has a zero-use reading so that account will be reviewed. On my part, I read my bill each month assuming we had not used enough water to break the minimum payment threshold and paid what your department said I owed in good faith. I would appreciate your considering reversing all back charges entirely.

Finally, if you will not eliminate the charges in total, I insist that you recalculate my use prior to the meter's installation. Your assumption of 4400 gallons per month (which I understand from friends in the industry to be “average”) is not at all in line with the “subsequent use” shown since the meter has been installed.

As of this date, I have only received one full month's billing, and that was for 2500 gallons. For the partial month listed on your Adjustment Calculations, my “original usage” (from July 31 through August 22) was 1900 gallons. In order to make your 4400 gallons a month “fit,” you had to adjust 2500 gallons... FOR NINE DAYS! That we would actually use 1900 gallons in THREE WEEKS but you could adjust for 2500 additional gallons in a period of just over ONE WEEK is ridiculous. According to your brand new meter, we only used 2500 gallons during the ENTIRE MONTH of August 22 through September 21. There is no way we used 2500 gallons of water in NINE DAYS.

The water service started on February 7, 2013. A single man moved into this house on February 8, 2013. Prior to his renting this house, it had been totally remodeled and outfitted with energy- and water-efficient appliances and plumbing fixtures. The front-loader washing machine only uses 11-14 gallons of water per load as opposed to “traditional” washers, which use 40. The obnoxiously low-flow toilet uses 1.6 gallons of water per flush. We do not have a pool or lawn sprinkler system. Our yard is mostly mulch, and the few square feet of grass at the front are never watered.

For two months, a single man lived in this house, therefore you cannot assume usage based on the “average” household of 4 people. My daughter and I moved in in April, having lived in an RV for two years. We were accustomed to showering with only 7 gallons of hot water, and therefore do not take long showers. We still have all of the low-usage appliances. It is likely that our water usage will continue to average 80-90 gallons per day rather than the 146 gallons your random assignment assumes.

You must recalculate my use. If you want to use 2500 gallons, we can see to what that works out and figure a plan from there. If you would prefer to allow two more billing cycles to complete between now and December 24, and then take an average of those, I would be willing to cooperate with that, also.

During the mean time, please take the “late” charges off of my account so that I can pay my regular and correct monthly bill.

I expect to hear from you by October 31 or I will file a complaint with the appropriate regulatory agency. If I need to request a hearing, then please include the information regarding how to do that when we next communicate.

Thank you,

Laura Gatannah

To illustrate, the last two months are actual use, and the other six months are their estimated use.

Because there was a deadline and because there is money and time involved, I have logged my actions. Here they are, in chronological order, not edited for grammar or attitude.

1. Letter dated 9/24. Postmarked 10/18.
2. Called and left a message for Patricia Muraida on 10/21/13 @ 12:01 AM
3. Called and left a message for Patricia Muraida on 10/21/13 @ 10:42 AM
4. Web search for who regulates the water utilities; according to the Public Utility Commission of Texas ( http://www.opuc.texas.gov ):
   Water Utility Complaints
   If you have complaints or inquiries concerning water quality, rates, service or billing, you can contact your water supplier directly or contact the Water Supply Division at the TCEQ at 512-239-3504 or 1-888-777-3186.
   You may also e-mail complaints to the TCEQ at: cmplaint@tceq.state.tx.us
   Website: http://www.tceq.state.tx.us
   You may write to the TCEQ
   TCEQ
   P.O. Box 13087
   Austin, TX 78711-3087
5. Called that number @ 12:27 PM and was told that I needed to call 512-239-6100.
6. Called that number @ 12:28 PM and got a “subscriber no longer in service” message.
7. Called TCEQ back @ 12:29 PM and the woman wanted to know how where I got their number. She apologized and said that an Austin issue shouldn't have come to her, and that she was going to transfer me to someone who might be able to help me. Then she hung up on me.
8. E-mailed a letter to myaccount@coautilities.com 10/22/13 @ 12:38 AM.
9. Received a phone call from 512-444-8888, Patricia, 10/22/13 9:18 AM that she was home sick today and the computers were down at the water department, but that she was going to start the administrative process and let me know the next step when she had that information.
10. Patricia called on 10/24 and said that she'd wait until this billing cycle completed to see about reevaluating.
11. Bill posted on 10/28. Last month, we used 2500 gallons of water.
12. Called and left a message for Patricia at 8:30 AM 10/30/13, at 512-972-0017.
13. Called and left another message for Patricia at 2:10 PM.
14. Called 888-777-3186 and she gave me the same number as before (512-239-6100) which is out of service. She transferred me. Mailbox 8101. Left a message.
15. That person called me back and said they have no jurisdiction over the Austin utilities.
16. Patricia called me and said she was working on a special project through Friday but would review my information next week. 2:28 PM.
17. Called Patricia and left her a message. 8:16 AM 11/8/13
18. Called 512-494-9400 @ 2:12 PM 11/8/13. OMG. Phone tree. Got someone who transferred me to water, and when I picked the correct number, it sent me back to the original place. Have to choose “0.” Want to speak to someone in retail. Three cycles of switchboard answering. At 2:28 I finally got a voice mailbox... which was Patricia's.
19. 512-972-0000 @ 2:31 PM. Consumer Service.
20. Patricia called back and said she'd forwarded it and that it should be changed in my account soon.
21. Got a Tweet from the Water Department based on a picture I Tweeted this morning.
22. Called and left a message for Patricia because my account is still the same, and I have a notice that the bill is due tomorrow. 10:27 AM 11/13/13
23. Called and left a message for Patricia. The August bill is still too high. 2:28 PM 11/19/13
24. Patricia called and said it had been handled, but it hadn't. I explained AGAIN to her that August was too high, and she said she'd send it back to customer service. 11:16 AM 11/20/13
25. Called Patricia back and asked about the status of this because it's still showing the same amount. 2:00 PM 12/9/13

This is where we stand now. It almost looks like they're flipping me off, doesn't it?

Whereas they originally said that we owed them $246.42, now we're down to $119. But it's still 1700 gallons "off" (maybe more; we'll never know), and I can't pay them until it's right because I don't bet they're going to give me my money back when they realize their error. 

At least we had it better than these people, though!

Trader Joe's Speculoos Cookie Butter (all of 'em!)

I had an idea that I should do a cookie butter review, featuring every one of Trader Joe's Speculoos varieties, as well as Biscoff's spreads. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done since I don't like going to the store, and since TJ's is still new enough here that they frequently run out of cookie butter.

When they first opened, they didn't even have the cookie butter out. You had to ask at the cash register, and you could only have one. Then a few weeks later, it was out, but you could only buy three. When I went back to get it this time, there was no longer a limit, but they were out of the crunchy butter.

This weekend, though, my sister got the crunchy for me, so I ended up with all three!

But, as you can see, we'd already opened and eaten the regular and cocoa. So... here are some thoughts:

The regular cookie butter is mostly smooth, but does still have a bit of grit in it. It's grainier than Biscoff, but also tastes heartier. It's basically crushed up cookies with oil and sugar. What I'm saying is that it's a health food.

My brother-in-law Ken pointed out that the #1 ingredient in the cocoa cookie butter is oil. So, again, we're dealing with some intensely nutritious substance here. This spread is a lot smoother than the regular cookie butter, with almost no discernible solids. The cocoa makes the spread taste not quite as sweet, but it's a very decadent jar of deliciousness.

Speaking of my brother-in-law, the crunchy cookie butter is his favorite. It has bigger chunks of cookies in it, but it's not as crunchy as crunchy peanut butter... probably because cookies are crunchier in a different and less-hard way than peanuts. 

Yeah. All of these are in my house at the same time.

Basically, I think of these as frosting rather than any kind of bread spread. Daphne likes the cocoa spread with Ritz-type crackers as a sweet/salty dessert. I think it pairs well with sliced tart apples. Ken (the BiL) eats the crunchy spread with hard pretzels. Today, I had a few stalks of celery with it, and it's a lot easier to chew up than celery with peanut butter. I really enjoy the regular cookie butter with bananas, too. It's almost like a banana pudding with vanilla wafers, but it's a lot easier.

Bottom line: These are all tasty. I still need to compare them to Biscoff, which is smoother than any but the cocoa Trader Joe's spreads. Flavor-wise, I don't know that I prefer any one to the other. Consistency, though... well, stay tuned!

Adventures in Family Planning

A warning: This is not going to be a pretty blog post. It covers some pretty personal stuff, and I'm certain that my feelings on the matter are not flattering. I'm just thinking about it, and decided to write it down. Feel free to proceed or to go away; I won't be offended if you won't. :)

A couple of weeks ago, I did something that is possibly illegal. I ordered drugs online without a prescription. Specifically, I ordered birth control pills. In the end, I sent them back because they were advertised as ortho tri-cyclen, and when I got them, the two hormones weren't the ones in that specific type of pill. Plus, they were manufactured in and sent from India, as Class H drugs. These drugs aren't as closely monitored as Class X drugs, and I did not want to end up growing a third arm or anything.

So now I'm back where I started.

First of all, you might be tempted to tell me, "Just go to a doctor and get a prescription like a normal person!" Are you new? I don't like going to the doctor unless I'm sick. Also, when you're uninsured, this kind of thing is ridiculously expensive.

When I was very young, in high school and still living at home, I was put on birth control pills by my doctor (and an elder at our church! SO embarrassing!) because I had some excruciating pain, stimuli over-sensitivity, fainting, digestive issues, etc. at "that time" of the month. Until I got married, I never used birth control as... well, birth control. But I was on it from the time I was 16 until I was 28. Yikes! 12 years of hormone regulation!

Anyway, when I was on my parents' insurance, I had no idea what birth control cost. When I went to college, before I understood what Planned Parenthood was about, I went there because I could get the pills for $12 a month. Fast forward to 2013, and they're at least $50 a month; more than I pay for my rescue inhaler, which actually saves my life.

Yes, this is how I think about things. Aren't you glad you don't have to live with me?

Still, it seems crazy to have to pay  more than $1 a day not to get pregnant when these drugs have been around for decades and cannot possibly cost that much to manufacture. I guess you're paying somewhat for peace of mind, as I saw with the "I cannot possibly take these" recoiling I experienced from my overseas drugs.

James has talked about taking permanent measures not to produce a baby, and this is where we (or at least I) run into a little bit of internal push-back. Because it's permanent. Are we really sure that we don't want to have a kid together?

Okay, first of all, the worst part of this is that the reason I don't want to get pregnant RIGHT NOW is that I have booked a cruise for D's 13th birthday. I would take her if I had an at-least-two-month-old baby and my mom would watch the baby for a week. However, you can't get on a ship if you're more than 24 weeks pregnant (you have to have a note from the doctor), so between right now and the end of May, I don't want to get pregnant! This is an important rite of passage which I promised my daughter, and I really, really want us to be able to make the trip as a family.

Now, two years ago, I would have told you that I never wanted to have any more kids. Actually, twenty minutes after Daphne was born, I would have told you the same thing. I was glad I'd had her, but I felt like that was it. I was a basket case with a newborn, and I never ever wanted to go through that again. (I am a GREAT toddler, preschool, and elementary mom, though!)

Then I met James. He never had kids, he explained to me the first weekend we reconnected, because he felt like (and this is a very novel idea) children need two parents, and he'd never met anyone he'd want to spend the rest of his life with, which was necessary for raising a kid together. When we started dating, I jokingly said that if he ever did want kids, he should probably break up with me, but then, as time passed, I softened my stance on that whole thing. James is such a sweet father-figure to Daphne that I know he'd be a nurturing dad and parenting partner. I decided that, if I could give him that, then that'd be awesome.

Two weeks after we got married, I got pregnant. It was unexpected, but I got used to the idea... and then I miscarried. Here's something important I want to explain: I don't feel like I "lost as baby" as much as I had a failed pregnancy. I don't know if it was the short duration of the whole thing, or the fact that it was so developmentally un-human-like, or just that we had the Haiti trip so I didn't experience a focused period of grief. But that's how it feels now: That I was pregnant, but didn't have a baby. What I lost, what I did grieve briefly, was the idea that I was going to be able to do something for James that no one else had ever done for him. (I might be a tad competitive in that way. And other ways. But I digress.) The loss of the idea of having and raising a child with James was what hurt. But only mildly, and very quickly.

But that reality is another thing that plays into this "What to do now?" decision-making. The older we get, the higher the chances are of having a baby with genetic mutations or special needs; Downs Syndrome, schizophrenia, and Autism, specifically. And, like I said, our first shot was not remotely viable.

In other words: the longer we wait, the higher the risks. Also, the longer we wait, the older we will be when our child(ren) is finally an adult(s). I look forward to having a belated honeymoon with James in 6 years or so when my dear daughter sees fit to leave her mother and seek her fortunes. Having a child now, or two years from now, would push that back another decade and a half (and that assumes it is a completely healthy baby). But right now is not a good time, either!

So, what to do? Do we make a permanent decision? Do we intervene at all or just leave it in God's hands? I'm not asking you for your advice; I'm just saying that these are the questions with which I wrestle.

(P.S. There are other options I have not discussed because the internet and this blog are public, and some of that is none of anyone else's business. ;) )

Rockin' it a cappella (huh!)

There is no way to go back and explain what this means. The history is ponderous, sad, and, honestly, it's sort of amazing that it's as big a deal as it is. But it is. Some of you know why. If you don't, just trust me that it's a big deal.

"Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?" started airing on PBS my first year of college. I remember, during the winter 1992 semester, taking early enough classes that if I rushed home, I could be there in time to catch the show every afternoon. In the days before in-house internet was affordable for a college student working 17 hours per week, I would sit up next to the television during the closing credits, trying to write down the words to the theme song. It was brilliant. The game show was educational and cheesy and fun, but the big draw was, of course, the house band, Rockapella.

Then life happened, I got married, moved to Las Vegas, got divorced, got married again, and, just as Daphne's dad suggested that I get a hobby, somehow found that Rockapella was still making music, and had, in fact, just released an album called, of all things, "Rockapella," their third American release.

I bought the album, loved it, and immediately went about the business of acquiring the Japanese-release records. Then, lo and behold, they were actually touring in the US! My first concert was in Redding, California, in 1999. I saw several people for the first time who would soon become friends via a Yahoo! fan board and then from other concerts. (And, actually, there's a whole East Coast contingent of fans I've never met but whom I would certainly consider friends, as well.)

Over the next couple of years, I saw Rockapella perform in Redding; then Salt Lake City, Utah; Santa Barbara, California; Las Vegas, Nevada; Phoenix, Arizona; another Santa Barbara show; and then a final Las Vegas one. Except for the last concert, the line-up for that entire time was Scott Leonard, Kevin Wright, Elliott Kerman, Barry Carl, and Jeff Thacher. I believe that George Baldi III had replaced (in a manner of speaking) Barry the last time I saw Rockapella perform.

My sister went with me to a couple of shows (if I remember correctly, a little bitty Hannah went with us to one of the Vegas performances), but other than that, I went alone, meeting up with my friends before and after. Then a whole lot of stuff happened, and that was that.

Until last night.

When I found out that Rockapella was coming to Austin, James was not working. He'd been laid off, and yet he told me to buy tickets... for all three of us. This is a man who 1) doesn't go out on Sunday nights because he needs to recharge for the work week; 2) is not interested in this style of music in the least; and 3) trusted that I'd managed the money well enough that if I thought we could afford the tickets, we should go for it.

So we did!

First, we waited expectantly for Daphne to get home from her Thanksgiving trip. Then we went to the One World Theater.

First, we had dinner. According to the FAQs on the website, no you cannot just buy concert tickets. Dinner is always included. The dinner was actually pretty good, even though the drinks were extra and my Diet Coke expired in September so was pretty flat and metallic-tasting.

The venue itself is lovely. According to its Facebook page, it's the best place to get married. I'd argue for the Cathedral of Junk, but that's probably just me.

Then we moved into the theater for the show. First of all, I was a little bit sad to learn that they had sold only 100 tickets. Originally there had been two shows scheduled, and they ended up combining them. The good news for us is that their best seats are saved for season ticket-holders, and since some of them didn't show up, we were able to move in to upgraded seats one song in. (Otherwise, James would have seen most of the concert as performed by Jeff, because we were basically on the side of the stage.)

Since my last concert in 2002, Elliott Kerman left and John K. Brown took his place. Then Kevin Wright left and Steve Dorian took his place. I never got to see John K. Brown perform. His last performance was a couple of nights ago. Calvin Jones made his debut at the show we saw. He was focused, but did a great job! It was pretty nearly seamless!

Since this was a Christmas show, we got quite a few holiday songs, including the Dreidel song in honor of the fact that Hanukkah started on Thanksgiving this year. 

The show was so much fun, and they sound as great as always. Jeff is incredible, as usual. Scott kept calling the One World Theater "New World," which sounded very ominous. Since Rockapella's last album was Motown-inspired, there were a lot of those songs, and a couple of originals from the album before that. While Scott's arrangements of covers are unique enough, I really do prefer the originals. Given their uber-respectful-looking suits and the oldies music, I hope hope hope that Rockapella won't become a band catering to the Branson crowd (and no offense to you, if you're the Branson crowd). There are a lot of young a cappella groups gaining national attention, but I think there's still room for these guys to stay in there. They absolutely blazed the trail and made innovations to performance and arrangement and style that have set the bar for newer bands. I think Rockapella is at its best creating: new stuff, arrangements that turn existing songs on their heads (last night, specifically, "Rudolf," "Christmas Don't Be Late," and "Angels We Have Heard on High" were so much fun).

Oh, yeah, and the Dreidel song, which made me laugh out loud.

I can't even.

Mostly, it was a night to remember because my daughter and my husband were sitting on either side of me. I love my sister, and I appreciate my friends. But it was great finally to experience a Rockapella show with my family.

It's funny: About half way through the concert I realized that it was probably the first show I'd attended where I didn't note the set list to "report" later. Being a superfan in the early 2000s came with some (self-imposed) responsibilities. :)

A couple of people asked me if it was as emotional as I was expecting. First, I literally cried when I was buying the tickets. Then, just listening to their Christmas music as I put up the tree this weekend, I got choked up, as well. Last night wasn't any kind of catharsis; it was just a great night with my favorite people and some super talented musicians entertaining us.

I think I know why.

Back in the day, going to a Rockapella concert was like seeing a lighthouse from a lost and battered ship. It was a lifeline, a blinding beacon on an otherwise bleak horizon. Last night, it was like seeing a lighthouse from a cruise ship. It was lovely, and I stared at it for as long as it was visible, but I was watching from a place of intense joy, and I knew that when that light went out, there was still happiness and fun and bright life to experience.

When we got home, James was saying that he felt very under-dressed. I asked him if he meant "under age" because we were one of the very few who didn't appear to be "experienced" season ticket-holders. For the record, James was joking because he doesn't get self-conscious about what he's wearing. And I assured him that, whatever he was wearing, he is still the sexiest guy in the room. James said, "I don't know. That bass singer was pretty sexy." I still think James has him beat. But it was pretty incredible to be in the same room with both of them.